Just Breath
by Dream.Of.Rainy.Days-x
Summary: An AU no magic PL fiction. One moment can change your life. And it come so sudden, like a wave. So here's the challange. Do you stick it out and swim, or give in and be washed away? Not as cliche as it seems.
1. Unravel My Latest Mistake

**AN: I'm not sure about this fic. It just sort of came to me at 3AM when I was listening to the radio (damned insomnia) I might not finish it. I might take it off half way through. I'm not sure. Just giving it try. It really is a WIP. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own the characters of the Charmed TV show. Nor do I won the lyrics. They are from a song called "Breath (2AM)" by Anna Nalick. It really is a beautiful song.

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**_2 Am and she calls me cause I'm still awake  
Can you help me unravel my latest mistake  
I don't love him, winter just wasn't my season.  
Yeah we walk through the doors so accusing their eyes  
Like they have any right at all to criticize  
Hypocrites you're all here for the very same reason._**

**_Cause you can't jump the track  
We're like cars on a cable and life's like an hourglass glued to the table,  
No one can find the rewind button girl  
So just cradle your head in your hands.  
And breathe, just breathe, whoa breathe just breathe_**

**_There's a light at each end of this tunnel you shout cause you're just as far in as you'll ever be out  
And these mistakes you've made  
You'll just make them again if you'll only try turnin' around

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_**

The phone rang & he answered it as fast as he could before his parents woke up. He heard sobbing breath on the other end & his heart broke right there. It was Piper. That was all he did for a long while, not caring how long. He lay there and listened as she cried her heart out, not saying a word.

"I don't love him Leo." Was all she said and he mentally cursed Dan for putting her through this. She didn't deserve this. Any of this. "Don't tell anyone." She choked out. I never would. _Not if she didn't want me to_.

"What do you want me to do?" Leo asked slowly. He was willing to do anything for her, his best friend. She cried some more for a long time & he listened to it. Not sure of what to say to her.

"Want me to find a place?" He asked and there was silence on the other end, only the sound of ragged breath.

"Yeah." She whispered, barely audible.

"Ok." And then there was more crying. Leo's fist clenched, he had never wanted to hit something more than he did at that moment. He knew he had to go before his parents found out that he was on the phone at this time. But he didn't want to leave her.

"Have you told Dan?" He questioned her, but knowing the answer already.

"No, Leo I can't do that." The hysteria in her voice was thick and made Leo's blood almost boil. _How could her do this to her?_ But instead he told her it was all ok. She needed him to be strong and understanding. She didn't need him to go around hitting things. That wouldn't help anyone.

"I've got to go Pipe. You can call me again later in the morning okay?" He told her gently. She told him it was ok and that she would be fine. But he didn't believe her.

"Hey, Pipe…"

"Yeah?" her voice was cracked, and it almost hurt to hear her like that.

"I love you." Leo told her and he could almost hear her weak smile.

"I love you too."

And he put down the phone and felt his heart sink for her. A tear rolled down his cheek but he wiped it away with the heel of his palm. He would stay strong, she needed him.

**.xXx.**

He knocked on her front door at 12 in the afternoon. They both phone in school sick. She answered. Her long chocolate hair was pulled back into a messy ponytail, her cheeks tearstained and her eyes bloodshot; she was wearing grey sweats and a black pullover. She had never look more beautiful to him. He opened his arm and he fell against his chest. And she buried her face in the folds of comfort she found there. And there they stood, on her porch. And he held her as even more sobs racked her perfect body.

"You get any sleep last night?" he asked, breathing into her hair. Slightly dizzied by its scent. She shook her head and looked up at him.

"I couldn't." He nodded and moved her head back onto his chest, were his t-shirt was wet.

"Still wanna do this?" He asked her, squeezing her hand. She didn't answer for a long while and she stopped crying. He could tell how hard she was thinking. Piper squeezed his hand back.

"I've got to." She whispers. He voice was raspy from the crying. He pulled her in tighter, not knowing what else to do to comfort her.

**.xXx.**

Walking through the big double doors Pipers grip on Leo's hand increased. And he nails dug sharply into his skin. But he didn't care. If this was all he could do for her, he would take it. He glanced back at her to catch sight of her hastily wiping away a stray tear that betrayed her fear.

He could feel the glaring eyes of strangers as they took their seats in the far corner of the waiting room. _Hypocrites._ They couldn't talk. They were all here for the very same reason.

He turned his head to check on Piper again. She was snow white, except for her eyes. They were blood red. And again he felt his fist clench. Dan had done this to her. And he wouldn't even care if he did know. Leo bent over and whispered into her ear "It's gunna be okay Pipe. I promise." And he punctuated that by giving her hand another re-assuring squeeze. She nodded. Not once looking at him.

Leo heard them call her name but she didn't move.

"Piper Halliwell?" They called again, but still she stayed motionless.

"I can't Leo. I can't do it." More tears rolled down her cheeks and he pulled her back into him. Wanting nothing more than to block out her pain.

"Shhhhh, it's gunna be ok. It's gunna be ok Piper. I promise you." He told her over and over again as he stroked her hair and rocked her. "It's gunna be ok."

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**AN: So, do you like that? I hope so. R & R and tell me if this fic is worth continuing. Thanks.**


	2. Then & Now

**AN: So, here's chapter two. Again, I'm still not convinced what's going to come of this fiction. But I'm gunna give it a good a try as I can give it. This chapter takes place around year or so after the first one. Just a little filler to help me get myself into this story. **

**Disclaimer: Again, I don't own any of the characters that appear the Charmed TV series. I do however own the original characters that pop up every now and then. And also the lyrics aren't mine either. They are from a song by Charlotte Church called "Even God Can't Change The Past". Also lyrics from "Breath (2AM)" again. By Anna Nalick.

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Leo knocked on Piper's front door; he came to see her every day. Since she started home schooling, this was the only way he could see her anymore. The door opened and there she stood, the same as always. Wearing Blue jeans and a t-shirt, her hair pulled back and a gorgeous sleeping baby boy resting on her hip.

"Hey Leo!" She smiled and reached for his hand, which he took as she led him in.

"How you doin'?" She cheerfully asked him as she lay the baby in its cot.

"Good. I'm fine. You?" He asked as they sat down on her bed together.

"Fine. I'm glad he's asleep for once. We haven't talked in forever!"

"Yeah, I know" A smile spread across his face. She was happy. He was glad, as he spent most of his day worrying about her.

"So, how's school? Got a girlfriend Leo?" She smiled, running a hand through his hair, "You got highlights…"

"School's boring without you. And no, no girlfriend." Leo smiled back at her.

"But I heard that you took Lilly Kyle to the dance last week…" She teased him.

"Yeah I did. But she's not my _girlfriend_. Just a few dates is all that's gone on. Nothing official."

"Oh, ok." Piper lay down, resting her legs over Leo's. Closing her eyes and sighed, "I miss you, you know?" Her voice showed signs of sleep as she yawned. Leo just looked at her. An affectionate smile growing on his face.

"Yeah I know. I miss you too." He whispered to her, watching as sleep claimed her, wanting nothing more than to wake her up an talk to her. But he knew that he shouldn't. With little Jake she hardly got any sleep, and she deserved it.

Leo manoeuvred himself slowly off the bed. Shifting Piper's legs from his carefully, so not to wake her. He stroked her hair and kissed her forehead.

"Love you Pipe" he breathes against her skin and turned to look over to were Jake was sleeping soundly. "Love you too champ."

And he walked out of the room, quietly closing the door behind him.

**.xXx.**

Leo pulled open the door of his locker slowly. He wasn't in a good mood today. Not in a _bad _mood exactly. Just sad. He was really starting to miss Piper. Last night just reminded him of how much. He glanced at his locker door. It was full of pictures. Pictures of him and Piper. They were smiling and happy on them. His favourite one was the one he kept in the top right hand corner of the door.

It showed the whole gang about two years back. Before anything happened with Dan, and everything was still happy. All five of them, even Nathan an Rick, were stood in the park, soaked through from the rain., but smiling and laughing all the same. They all had their arms around each other and Leo was kissing Piper on the cheek. A tear stung in his eye at the memory and he closed the door.

That was then, and this was now. And no matter how bad you want do. You can't go back.

**.xXx. **

_**Even God can't change the past  
No matter how many tears I've cried  
Yes, I thought this love would last  
Who am I to question why  
Who am I**_

**.xXx.**

Piper stared blankly down at her work in front of her. It was making no sense. And her tutor would be back soon. She walked over to the playpen where Jake was lay on his back, staring up at his mobile. Now and then, gently batting the shapes. He cocked his head to look at her with big blue eyes. _God, he's adorable._

She walked around her room and stopped at her chest of drawers and looked at the pictures she had on there. A handful of Jake pictures, a few of her and her two sisters but most were her and her friends.

Her favourite one of all was one taken about two years back in the park. All five of her then closest friends, even Nathan and Rick, were in it. They all had their arms around each other, laughing and smiling and drenched in rain. Leo was kissing her on the cheek. It seemed like a different lifetime now. Another world away from where she was now.

Back then they had everything. What happened? She asked herself, but she immediately knew the answer. _Dan happened. _Sighing, she turned back to Jake, who was smiling up her. She loved Jake so much. But sometimes she wished she could just go back and do it all over. Back to when the picture was taken.

But life didn't go back. It just carried on. Wiping away a tear that escaped she sat back her desk, with her head in hands and tried to make sense of the work. As if anything made _any_ sense anymore.

**.xXx.**

_**'Cause you can't jump the track,we're like cars on a cable  
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table  
No one can find the rewind button girl,  
So cradle your head in your hands  
And breathe, just breathe,  
Woah breathe, just breathe**_

**.xXx.

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**AN: You like? R&R pleeeease.**


	3. No Matter How Hard You Try

**AN: So chapter three. Here it is. A few months after chapter two. So that Jake is 7 months old. And I don't know about anywhere else but that would set them Graduation in England. In July. I know that this is moving pretty fast but it needs to really. And this chapter does have some Leo/OC in it. You have been warned. Don't hate me for it, I need it for the plot.

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Leo stood behind his classmates and friends, pulling at his graduation robes. This didn't feel right. Piper was supposed to be here. They talked about it all the time when they were younger. They would graduate together. And she wasn't here. And he felt like he was betrayed all the promises they made to each other. HE felt a hand on his shoulder, and then lips against his.

"Hey Leo." A familiar girls voice rang through his head.

"Hey Lilly." He looked down at his girlfriend of three months stood in front of him. He opened his arms out and pulled her to him, kissing the top of her head, going through the motions of your typical caring boyfriend.

"I haven't seen you all day." She mumbled in his chest and he nodded. "I missed you." She pulled back to look up at him.

"Yeah, me too." He answered, forcing out a realistic smile for her sake. Really she was perfect. Pretty, smart, funny… everything a guy could ask for. And he did like her. But there was just the one thing, that one niggling feeling at the back of his mind. He just couldn't put his finger on it.

"How you feelin?" Lilly asked, pulling away and checking her hair in the mirror close by.

"Fine." Leo tried to be convincing but had a feeling it didn't work.

"Missing Piper?" Lilly knew him so well. Almost better than anyone did. But not quite. No one could come as close as _she _did to him. And he knew that deep down Lilly knew it too. She squeezed him hand.

"Yeah." He sighed and looked outside at the seats. They were filling up with proud parents on the back half. The front half was empty, waiting for the student to come out. He squeezed her hand back and held it firmly in his grip. Desperate for some kind of comfort.

_Piper should be here._

Fighting back the sharp sting of new tears he turned back around. Piper wasn't here. He just had to deal. You can't change the past. No matter how hard you try. He should know.

**.xXx.**

_Leo held Piper close as they lay on the damp grass of the park, staring up at the stars. He reached out with his finger tips and played with her hair._

"_What you thinking about?" He asked her, his voice coming out in a husky whisper, and she could feel his hot breath playing across her cold skin._

_She pressed her lips to his in a soft kiss. That when he tried to deepen she pulled away smiling._

"_This very sexy guy that I know." She smiled, snuggling further into him._

"_Do I know him?" Leo asked smiling back her, his right hand gently stroking the smooth skin just above her jeans._

"_No, he's too good for you to know." Her left root nudged his right foot as she turned over in his arms to face him. _

"_Tell me about him…" Leo ran a hand through her hair and brushed a few stray stands away from her face so he could see her eyes._

"_Well, he's very cute. And has these amazing green eyes. And the best smile ever. " And as she was saying this, she let her fingertips blaze trails across his face. _

"_He sounds the best" Leo kissed each of her eyelids as he noticed them closing from exhaustion. Piper yawned slightly and buried her face into his chest._

"_He is."_

**.xXx.**

Leo stood on the stage and looked carefully around the sea of faces, looking for her. He couldn't see her. Fighting back yet more tears her turned to face the head master.

"Leo Wyatt!" The headmaster said into the microphone for a second time and handed him his high school diploma. Leo walked off stage and found his seat next to Lilly.

"I can't believe we're actually graduating!" She babbled excitedly into his ear and he laughed a little. She really was adorable. He kissed her cheek and turned his head back to the stage where more students were.

_She promised she'd be here._

Everyone stood and cheered. This was it. The big moment he had been building up to since he was 9 and now it was here it all felt worthless. She wasn't here.

**.xXx.**

Piper stared out of her bedroom window. It was graduation today. She was supposed to be there. With him. They made a promise to each other a long time ago. Promises and plans that they would graduate together. She had meant to be there today. To see him. And she missed him more than anything else. They hadn't really talked properly for a while now. She was always busy with Jake and he was at school. Sure he came to see her every night but she was always tired from staying up to look after her Jake. Or he was crying and needed attention, it was always one or the other. So missed him so much. And she wanted to see him today. But Jake was ill. And she couldn't leave him like that. Off to the doctors it was.

He just had a cold, but with him this young Piper knew you couldn't take any chances. She picked him up and pulled him to her.

"Your ok aren't ya buddy?" She asked him and Jake just made a gargling noise back at her. She smiled at his adorableness. "Yeah, I know"

She reached for her mobile phone and punched in Leo's number.

"Leo?"

"Piper! Where were you?" He sounded slightly annoyed, but being Leo, he was trying to hide it. It was understandable.

"Jake was sick a couldn't leave him. I'm so sorry Leo." Leo immediately felt all the annoyance drain from body. It wasn't her fault.

"It's ok Piper. I understand totally." Leo told her. "You comin' to the party though?"

"I can't Leo. My mum and dad are out tonight, they can't look after him. Prue lives in the halls on the other side of town and Phoebe's on a date. I have to stay. Leo, I'm sorry." Tears rolled down her face. She hated letting him down like this bit what could she do.

"It's fine Piper. Don't get upset over it. I'll stop by before I go." His reassuring voice came to her.

"Ok, I better go now. Sorry Leo."

"It's fine. See you later."

And there phone conversation was ended. Why did everything have to be so messed up?

**.xXx.**

"_Your cold." Leo noticed as Piper rubbed her arms._

"_No, I'm fine." She told him but Leo was already taking off his jacket for her, "Thanks"_

_Leo stared at her for long moment. There she stood. Her blowing wildly with the wind, her cute little nose pink and her cheeks flushed. Looking tiny in his oversized jacket and he wanted nothing more than to just take her in his arms. So he did._

"_I love you, you know that right?" He told her and he felt her nod._

"_You know I love you too?" She asked. He slipped his cold hands underneath her top to rest on the bare skin of her back. "Your cold." He moved his hands to her stomach, and moved them in small, gentle circles. _

"_I'm warming up." He smirked and kissed her forehead, then bridge of her nose, and the dip above her lip and finally her mouth. And that's how they stood. For as long as they could stand the cold. _

_Just two teenagers in love, playing a game of tug of war with their lips. Just two teenagers content in their feelings for each other. Just two teenagers oblivious to the pain that would lie ahead of them._

**.xXx.

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**AN: I really enjoyed writing this chapter. What did you think?**


	4. Start Of The Storm

**AN: This chapter is basically one big flashback. Set around a year before the first chapter. Oh and for everyone, the bit in italics are flashbacks. In this particular chapter they are only set around a few hours before the normal text. But in other chapters they can be up to two years before. Yeah, that's for you to work out.

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The heavy bass line pounded through Leo's chest so hard that it almost hurt as he pushed his way through the crowd of hot teenage bodies, trying to find Piper. They shouldn't have come. When Nathan told them all about the party he forgot to mention about all the drugs and alcohol that would be here. And now all he wanted to do was get Piper out of there. He was going to kill them when he found them later.

**.xXx.**

_All five of them lay around Nathan and Rick's bedroom, laughing and joking as usual. Piper and Leo sat close together on the red beanbag in the corner of the room. Rick and Jamie cuddle on his bed and Nathan was sat on his desk chair snipping wildly around. Piper was getting dizzy just watching him._

_"So you guys coming to the party tonight?" Rick as the room and Nathan nodded. "Dan told us about it."_

_"Dan?" Leo asked._

_"You know our old friend from back in L.A. He's transferring over here." Leo knew who it was now. Dan had a bad rep from what Nathan and Rick had told them about him._

_"You guys coming?" Nathan asked and Jamie nodded, and Leo looked at Piper. He knew how much she didn't like big parties, and he wouldn't go if she didn't. He's rather stay behind and watch movies with her anyway._

_"Piper?" He asked, already knowing the answer. Piper looked around the room, at her friends._

_"Sure why not." Leo was surprised by her answer but nodded._

_"Ok, I'm in."_

**.xXx.**

Leo wished she'd just have said no. Then he'd be sat at home, on the couch, with Piper, probably watching some old chick flick with Freddie Prnz Jr, and pigging out on chocolate. Instead of what he was really doing. In a hot, sweaty house party, fuelled by drugs, surrounded by high teenagers and searching for his girlfriend. He raked a shaking hand through his damp hair.

"Piper!" He scream so his lungs burned from the smoke, but it was no use. He couldn't hear himself over the beats, so nobody else could. Looking around he spotted Nathan in the corner making out with some random girl. He made his way over (which is harder than it sounds) and pulled him off her.

Looking into the face of his best friend Leo shook his head. Nathan's eyes were bloodshot to the extreme and he was zoned out. But there were more important things right now…

"Have you seen Piper!" Leo asked him but Nathan shook his head. And then a look of nausea crossed his face and he ran off. Leo couldn't believe the way he was acting. He though Nathan knew better than that. Leo's head spun from the heat an his t-shirt clung to him. He needed to get out of there.

Stepping outside he welcomed the cool air, and sat down on the steps. He needed to find her. If anything happened to her, and it could inside there, he didn't know what he would do. Filling his lungs with fresh air for one last time he stepped back in.

**.xXx.**

_Leo watched with a smile on his face as he watched Piper apply her make in her bedroom mirror. He was sat on her behind her so he could see exactly what she was doing. He loved to watch her do this. Especially eyeliner. He couldn't explain it. He just loved it. The temptation got to much for him and he waked over to her. Pulling her to him from behind, nuzzling her neck._

_"You're beautiful." He breathed lightly against the sensitive skin where her neck and shoulder met. He felt her shiver._

_"Leo… Get off. I need to do this." She half-heartedly struggled to get out of his grip. But smiled anyway, "Leooooo…" She mined but stopped moving in his arms._

_"Why? You look perfect." He kissed her neck again a few more times, and felt her knees shudder._

_"Leo.. " she whined again, and made puppy dog eyes at him. "Please, just let me do this…" He stared down at her and laughed a little. He never could resist those eyes of hers. He released her. And she sighed._

_"Thank—" but before she could finished he pressed on e kiss onto her lips. When he pulled away she just looked at him. "Oh great, now I have to re-do my lip-gloss."_

**.xXx.**

"Piper!" Leo tested his newly refreshed lungs, but it didn't help. It was no use. He couldn't find her. He frantically scanned the mass of bodies, moving wildly to the music. He spotted Jamie and Rick making out in the kitchen. He guessed they were high too. He felt tears sting in his eyes but he ignored them, He needed to fine Piper. He pushed people away and pulled his two best friends apart. They just stared at him and laughed hysterically. Oh god.

"Rick!" He yelled but Rick just carried on laughing, "Rick.. Rick!" Leo hits his friends face and Rick shook his head from reflex. "Have you seen Piper!"

Leo looked between both their spaced out faces until Jamie nodded slowly.

"Thank God. Where!" He shook her shoulder slightly; her blonde hair flew over her face. "Where is she Jamie?" He repeated, the hysteria in his voice rising. Jamie pointed up the stairs and Leo's heart raced out of fear. Oh. My. God.

He ran up the stairs and opened every door he came to. To say least, he saw way to much flesh, but none of them was Piper. As he came to the last door, his breathing grew ragged and his hand shook as he reached for the door handle. But he flung it open.

**.xXx.**

There was Piper, sat there on the bed, with a guy, just talking. He let out a sigh of relief and walked over.

"I've been looking everywhere for you Pipe." He kissed her forehead and sat down next to her. Looking to the guy. "Who are you?" He asked defensively. Piper jumped in before the guy had a chance to open his mouth.

"Leo, sweetie, this is Dan. Dan this is Leo. My _boyfriend_." Warning bells rung loud and clear in Leo's mind.

_"So you guys coming to the party tonight? Dan told us about it."_

Leo stiffened and pulled at Piper's arm. "We're leaving" He told her and pulled her up, walking her out of the room. She turned and waved.

"Bye Dan."

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**AN: That took me a while to write due to writers block but I'm still ahead of myself by 3 chapters so its all good. R&R please!**


	5. Her Lifeline

**AN: This is set not too long; about a month or so, after chapter three. I know I'm slightly confusing with all the jumping around in time but it's the best way to get a full story of what happened to Leo and Piper.**

**Disclaimer: The characters of the Charmed TV series aare not mine/ And also the lyrics aren't mine either. They are from an awesome song by the All-American Rejects, called "One More Sad Song".

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If you asked Leo what the exact point in time that they fell apart, he could tell you. Sure, he didn't see it coming at the time, but hindsight's 20/20. It was that party. The party that changed his whole life, and his all his friends. The party that made sure his life fell down around him. Yeah, it was then.

And now staring out of his bedroom window, he wondered how things got so bad. How things went from the perfect fairy tale to the way they were now. He shook his head and turned around to see Lilly stood in his doorway. He smiled at her.

"Your mom let me up." She told him quietly and sat down at his bed, staring at his feet. Leo felt for her then. He wasn't fair to her. She hadn't done anything wrong. It wasn't her fault he was still in love with Piper. He sighed and sat down next to her.

"Hey." He kissed her once and pulled her to him. Trying to reassure her that he wasn't forgetting her all the time. Trying to reassure himself of that fact.

"Hey." She said back to him, he voice was empty and Leo's heart broke knowing he had done that to her. He ran a hand through her short blonde hair and kissed her head. He knew how she must have been feeling. The same way he felt towards the end of his and Piper's relationship. But he wasn't going to let Lilly go.

"I'm sorry Lils." He told her genuinely. He was sorry. She nodded.

"I don't think I can do this anymore Leo." Her voice was so quiet, he could barely hear. But he did.

"Lilly…" But she stopped him.

"I see the way you look at her Leo. I'm not blind. I know you love her." Leo reached for her hand and squeezed it, pleading her with his eyes. He couldn't let this end. It was good for him. He needed this, to get over Piper.

"Lilly, I promise you. I want this to work. Just give it chance." Her eyes were filing up with tears. "Please Lills." He brushed his lips to hers briefly, not quite a kiss. She stared at him. And after a short moment nodded. Leo pulled her to in a hug, resting his head on top hers.

If this was a good thing, why did it feel so wrong?

**.xXx.**

_**One boy, one girl, two hearts, their world  
Time goes by, secrets rise  
One more, sad song, tears shed, she's gone  
She'd take it back, if she only could**_

_**And all the perfect words they seem so wrong,  
She's gone  
You wish that you could learn to see,  
The door is closed and you wish you could be**_

**.xXx.**

_Piper knew as soon as she saw Leo that night what she had done was wrong. She knew that at the time, but she didn't stop it. She didn't even try to stop it. And that's what was eating away at her from the inside out as Leo's lips touched hers. She jumped away like she had been burnt and looked at him. She wanted to cry._

_His face was a mess of confusion, worry and sadness. She had done that to him. She hadn't meant to. Piper started to reach out to touch his cheek but couldn't bring herself to do it. She didn't deserve him after what she had done. _

"_What's wrong Piper?" He asked her, concerned. That broke her heart. He was too good for her. She wanted so bad to tell him everything, but couldn't do it. She couldn't break his heart like that. So she just shook her head._

"_Nothing." Her voice came out in a crack whisper and Leo frowned. She had never hid anything from him. And it killed him to know she was doing know. _

"_Piper…" He reached for her hand but she pulled roughly away. There was something very wrong._

"_Nothing Leo!" She was shouting now. Looking up at the look on Leo's face Piper let the tears fall. And then she turned and ran. Ignoring him as he called after her._

**.xXx.**

Piper held Jake in her arms and sighed. Two years ago things had been so clear. She had Leo. Leo had her. They loved each other. End of story. But then things went bad. Her whole life suddenly U-turned and spiralled out of control. She could tell you when. The exact point when things got triggered. The party.

The party that was a hurricane of drugs and alcohol. The party she said yes to even though she didn't want to go. She said she would. Something made her say yes. Now she wished will everything she was that she would've just said no. And stayed behind to watch movies with Leo.

If she hadn't have gone, she would've never met Dan. Nathan and Rick would still be on speaking terms with them all. She would still be with Leo. He wouldn't be with Lilly. She would've been at graduation. She wouldn't have Jake.

And to be honest Piper wasn't sure how she felt about that last one. She loved him more than anything but sometimes it was all too much for her. She was 18, she should be out living life. Not with a baby.

She kissed Jake on the forehead and laid him down in his crib, just as Phoebe walked in.

"Hey sis." She said and stood next to her, looking down at Jake. "He's so cute." Piper nodded. He was. He had dark brown hair and brown eyes. She was silently thankful that he didn't look much like Dan.

"What do you want Phoebe?" Piper asked, the question coming out ruder than she mad meant it to.

"I just wanted to see my perfect nephew." Piper smiled. Phoebe loved him so much. More than her mom and dad almost. "Piper…"

"What?"

"I know mom and dad wanted you to tell Dan about him, but I get why you didn't. I get it. And they do too. Deep down." Piper nodded, and hugged her little sister.

**.xXx.**

_Piper sat on the floor of the bathroom with her head resting against the edge of the toilet, tears running down her face. 7 weeks, and she still hadn't told her parents. Leo knew. Prue knew. But her parents and Phoebe didn't. Or Dan._

_Dan._

_She hadn't seen him in a month. She didn't want to either. And she should tell him about her baby. His baby. Their baby. But she couldn't. She knew what he would do. Dan would just accuse her of sleeping around behind his back and declare her a slut. Before breaking it off with her. So she did what anyone else would do. Not tell him and break it off herslelf._

_There was a knock at the door. Piper wiped away her tears quickly._

"_Who is it?"_

"_It's me." Came Leo's voice from the other side. He had been so supportive of her. After everything she had done to him. He still looked after her._

"_Come in." The door pushed open and there he stood, with a concerned look all over his face._

"_You okay Pipe?" He asked, sitting down next to her. She tried to speak but all that same out was a strangled sob. Leo just pulled her to him and let her cry into his shirt, just like he had done so many time recently. _

_Her lifeline.

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_

**AN: Yeah, this story is getting easier to write by the chapter. Which is awesome. I'm in love with this story. Please R&R. Thanks**


	6. Doesn't Love You Anymore

**AN: This is just a _very, very _short filler. A memory of Leo's. That's it. But chapter 7's going to be longer. Ok? But I like this chapter as a standalone chapter. I'm in love with it. So, yeah here's part six. Oh and the bit in normal text happens a short time after chapter 5. Okay, everyone good to go? Good.**

**Warning: There is some quite strong language in this chapter.

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**

Leo lay on his bed staring up at the ceiling, it was 4 in the morning, and he couldn't sleep. Too much was going on in his head. Too many memories playing over like a video tape. He closed he eyes tight, trying to shut them out.

**.xXx.**

"_If Dan says he didn't give them to her, then he didn't give them to her Leo!" Rick yelled at him. _

"_What the fuck? You know what he's like Rick!" Leo screamed back. The rage coursing through his veins was too much to control. _

"_Yeah I do know what he's like! And I know he wouldn't do that!" Leo had never seen Rick this mad before. And in another circumstance, it would've scared him. But not right now. Right now there was bigger things on his mind._

"_Rick! For fuck's sake! He was the only one there!" The vein in Leo's neck was growing, and his face was red._

"_He didn't do it Leo! Someone else must've been there!" They were screaming at each other more than they ever had. And as much as they both hated it, rage dragged them on. _

"_Your gunna side with him! After what he fucking did!" Leo couldn't believe what he was hearing. His best friend was choosing a drug addict, sexaholic over him._

"_He didn't do a fucking thing Leo! You just can't handle it because Piper's paying attention to someone besides you now!" Rick shouted, walking up towards him._

"_What!" Leo clenched his fist and fought with the over whelming urge to hit something. _

"_You heard me Leo! Piper decided you weren't all that after all! And found someone who is!" They were so close that Leo could feel Rick's spit on his as he yelled._

"_That's bullshit Rick." But Leo's voice was softer than it had been before._

"_No, Leo, it's not. And you know it too. Piper doesn't love you anymore!" That last part ripped through Leo like a blade. He knew it. Rick was right. "She doesn't love you Wyatt!" The anger came back and Leo drew his fist back. Before making contact squarely with Rick's jaw._

"_Fuck you." Leo said, almost a whisper before slamming the door._

**.xXx.**

Tears sprung to Leo's eyes as his fist flew back. He felt the plaster crumble, and he felt the warm liquid slip down his fingers. But he felt no pain.

"_Piper doesn't love you anymore!"

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_

**AN: Yeah I know it's short, But I like it as a chapter on it's own. R&R please. Thanks.**


	7. No One Can Find The Rewind Button

**AN: This is just another very short filler on feelings. And this chapter is set a few months after the party in chapter four. So it's before Piper get pregnant. You all understand that? Good. And I'm focusing on Nathan in this chapter. Okay? Here it is. Chapter seven.**

**Disclaimer: I own zero of the characters that appear in the Charmed TV Show. And the lyrics that appear at the start of this chapter are from an awesome song called "2AM (Breath)" by Anna Nalick.

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**

Nathan stood in the bathroom, looking in the mirror_. Is this what I've become now?_ His eyes were bloodshot, and hard dark rings around them. His teeth were yellowing, the after effects of the nicotine. He hadn't shaved for a week and my skin had a slight grey tint to it. Nathan splashed myself with ice-cold water and walked out. Not being able to handle his own reflection.

He hated the mirror right now. It didn't lie to him. It gave you back exactly what it saw. And Nathan hated that. He didn't want to know the truth about what he had turned into. He just wanted to stay inside my own little world, where everything was fine.

Yeah right.

Everything was so messed up right now, and everyone could feel it. He threw himself onto his bed and it rose and fell with his wait. _How did things get this bad?_ He almost laughed out loud then. There was no point denying it when he knew exactly how things got this way.

Dan.

The insane hurricane of drugs, sex and partying had been fun at first, but now it was getting old. Just the same thing over and over again. Dan was holding up just fine, none of this was getting to him, but Nathan.

All his best friends were worried about him. But he had always thrown it back into their faces, making it so he didn't know them anymore. He had even alienated his very own brother. How was that for a good guy?

There was a soft knock at the door and Nathan closed his eyes. He knew who it would be. The last person he wanted to see right now.

"You in there Nath?" It was Rick. Nathan briefly considered keeping his mouth shut but this was a convocation he needed to have.

"Yeah." _Is that really how I sound now? _Cracked and empty his voiced sounded around the room as the door was pushed open.

"I was hoping to find you here…" Rick stared at his brother and best friend with wide eyes. He turned his head not being able to look at him any longer and continued, "I wanted to talk to you…"

Nathan nodded and Rick sat on the bed next to him, looking out of the window.

"I'm worried about you Nath." That was all he said but tears stung in Nathan's eyes. "I'm worried about the way you're acting. It isn't right." Nathan nodded and let his brother carry on, "Why are you doing this?"

Rick was barely audible as her asked the part but Nathan heard him.

"I don't know." He stopped to shake his head and wipe away the forming tears, "I just don't know."

Rick looked at him for a few seconds before walking out for the room.

**.xXx.**

**_Cause you can't jump the track  
We're like cars on a cable and life's like an hourglass glued to the table,  
No one can find the rewind button boy  
So just cradle your head in your hands.  
And breathe, just breathe, whoa breathe just breathe_**

**.xXx.

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**

**AN: Yeah, I know this story isn't making next to sense to a lot of you right now, but you should be able to get the gist really. This is awesome; I'm about 6 chapter ahead of myself in writing this. Whoot! Go me! Ok, R&R please. **


	8. Never Stopped Loving You

**AN: Okay part eight here. Leo is currently in a university in Chicago, studying to be a doctor. This chapter is just a little insight into his life there. Set around 5 months after chapter 6. So it's around January. Jake is about a year old now.**

**I'm also pretty upset. Because, this is really some of my best writing, and this is my favourite story. Even more so than "Black Orbs" and it hurts when I only get 6 reviews and not so many hits. Really, if you guys hate it then I'll stop. Not because I want to, I love this story. But really, then if you guys don't wanna read it… I won't carry on.**

**Disclaimer: Zero of the characters that appear in the Charmed TV Show belong to me. Neither do I own the lyrics that appear. They are from an awesome song called "I Won't Be There" by an awesome band: Simple Plan.

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**

He hadn't seen her in a month and it was killing him. He missed her more than anything. He missed her more than his family, more than his friends.. She was San Francisco, California he'd been in Chicago, Illinois. Studying to do what he'd wanted to do for as long as he could remember. But he couldn't be happy. He missed her too much.

He'd seen her once since term began, and that was around a month ago. At Jake's first birthday. He was the closest thing to a father that kid had ever had, so he had to be there. Plus, he _wanted_ to be, for Jake and for Piper.

He pulled his coat tighter around him and walked faster. Trying to run away from the memories.

**.xXx.**

_Leo's taxi pulled up in front of the all to familiar house, and a smile spread across his face. It had been too long. Almost four months. How did he last that long, with only phone calls. She didn't know he was coming today. Leo paid the driver and pulled his bag from the back._

"_Thanks." He called to cabbie as he drove off. And he was alone. He dropped his suitcase at his side and just stared at the front door._

_How many times had he been here? And yet, this time felt different. Running a hand through his hair nervously he took a step towards the house. Bracing himself for what was about to come._

_He raised his hand, and made contact with the oak door. It wouldn't be long now. _

_Four months. The longest four months of his life._

**xXx.**

He sat down heavily onto his desk chair and turned on the light. It was four o' clock in the morning and he hadn't slept. Every time he closed his eyes he saw her. The one time he managed to drift off slightly, he dreamed of her as well. It was too much for him to handle. So he was studying.

Staring down at the books, he was drawing a blank. The words swam around the page and got mixed up. Closing the book he turned to another one, his notes. He read them, but nothing was sticking. His mind was too full of thoughts of her.

Growing frustrated he slammed his head against the wall, making a loud noise that sounded around the student flat. Leo just hoped he hadn't woken any of his roommates.

"That's enough." Standing up and making his way over to a pile of clothes.

**.xXx.**

_He knew he shouldn't. She knew she shouldn't. They both knew what they were about to do was wrong. But neither cared enough to hold themselves back. He caressed her cheek with his thumb and stared at her._

"_It's been too long Piper." He was so close she could feel his hot breath play against her skin. "Too long." Her breathing was ragged and her face was flushed. He loved to see her like this. _

"_I know." She nodded and that sent Leo over the edge. He pressed his lips against hers and that was it._

_It was like the past two years never happened. They were suddenly back to when why just 16, young and in love. Not a care in the world. Everything was as it should be then. Before Dan. Before Nathan and Rick went bad. Before Jake. Before everything. Just the two of them._

_How it should be._

_He pulled away slowly, although it almost hurt, to look at her. Resting his forehead against hers looking right into her eyes. He moved his hand down from her face to hold her hand. Entwining their fingers together. _

"_I never stopped loving you Piper." And kissed her again, not waiting from her answer. _

_She kissed him back just as eagerly, and she didn't stop him when he began to push her against the door. She didn't stop him when he pulled he into her bedroom and she didn't stop him when they fell onto her bed. _

**.xXx.**

The smoke of the bar was burning into Leo's lungs making it hard to breath, but he didn't move. He just took another shot of the amber liquid he held in his hand. Trying to numb the searing pain in his heart.

It wasn't working. It was just making it worse.

He had promised himself he would never drink again. Not after he had seen what it had done to his best friends in the space of just a year. Or was maybe Dan to blame for that? He shrugged slightly to himself and ordered up another one.

A young woman sat down next to him. She looked at him dark blue eyes in a way that made him shiver. He could feel the lust vibes just rolling off her. And his alcohol induced state of mind; Leo wanted her. Maybe she could make him forget.

"Hey." She said to him in a husky voice that dripped with sex. She drew it out, rolling her tongue over her lips. "You come here often?" Her line was so clichéd, in a normal situation he would've laughed. But right now…

"No." Leo answered, reaching for another shot and downing it, smiling at her. He made a gesture with his head towards the door.

"Wanna get out of here?" He asked and she stood up.

**.xXx.**

_**I can't stay  
Tomorrow I'll be on my way,  
So don't expect to find me sleeping in my bed  
'Coz when you wake up  
I won't be there**_

**.xXx.**

_Piper rolled over to find a cold, empty space next to her. Just a note on the pillow. Who ever said that your heart couldn't break twice had lied. She reached out for the folded piece of paper and tears rolled down her cheeks, hitting the pillow._

_My Piper,_

_I know this is probably the worst way to this. I didn't want to. But I was scared if I heard your voice I might not say what say what I need to say. Plus, you look so beautiful when you sleep. I didn't want to wake you for this._

_I'm not doing this because I don't love you. Believe me I do. More than anything ever in my life. I meant everything I said last night. Don't ever think that I only said that to get you into bed. Don't ever think that I used you. I would never do that Piper._

_I love you._

_But I have to do this. I'm going back to Chicago today. I have to go back to school. I can't start something and then just leave you here for however many months. It wouldn't be fair to you, or to me. You know it too._

_I'm not expecting you to wait for me either. Don't. You need to move on with life. If your still stuck on me, you'll never be happy. I want you to be happy. I never wanted anything else. So forget about me._

_I'll call soon. I love you. And Jake too. Tell him that for me._

_Your forever,_

_Leo._

_Piper just stared, her hands shaking violently and pulled the covers over her head._

**.xXx.**

Leo was pushed into the wall, her breath playing on his. Bricks pressing hard into the small of his back. Driving him crazy. He knew even at this stage that this was wrong, but in his drunken state he didn't care. Her lips crashing down onto his and he kissed back. He could feel a bruise forming on his back where the pressure was. But he didn't care. This woman could make him forget Piper. That was really all he needed right now, an escape from the constant heartache.

Her hands slid up his shirt, her cold fingers pressing hard against his heated flesh. Sending his mind spinning. He moved his own hands up her back, underneath her thin top, pulling it over her head, showering kisses over her shoulders and neck.

Not once opening his eyes. If he did that he would realise it wasn't Piper. He never once spoke a word. Not trusting his own voice. Instead he just concentrated on forgetting the one person he wanted to remember the most.

"More." The women whispered into his ear breaking Leo out of his haze. His head snapped up and the women stared back him a confused look all over her face.

Another turning point in his thoughts and Leo's mind stated a few clear facts to him. Facts he already knew, he just needed reminding of.

Leo Wyatt wanted Piper Halliwell. He always had, for as long as he cared to remember. He just needed the touch of another woman to remind him of that fact.

"I though we were having fun" The woman said softly as he picked his shirt up off the floor. He shook his head violently and ran as fast as could away from her.

He knew what he needed to do now.

**.xXx.**

"_I can't carry on like this Leo!" Lilly screamed at him, her artic eyes full of tears. "I can't act like I'm happy with you! I cant fucking do it any more!" Her scream echoed around the empty house._

"_But Lils…" Leo tried but she stopped him, and he let her, without any resistance._

"_No Leo! I let you charm me into keeping this up once before. But not now!" She sat down, tears spilling down her cheeks._

"_Lilly, please!" He tried again, but when she cut him off this time he decided to give up. _

"_I can't keep up the act any longer. I know you don't love me. I know you love her. I ignored it for too long. Tried to convince myself that you did like me too. But I can't anymore!"_

_Leo just nodded then, not denying it and sat next to her. Taking her hand in his._

"_I do like you Lilly." She nodded and smiled a watery smile at him. He pressed a soft butterfly kiss to the back her hand and walked out the door, feeling even number than he already had done._

**.xXx.**

**AN: I actually like this chapter. It's a pretty long one for me. The next chapter is going to be all one flashback. Okay? Just warning you. R&R please! And just because a few of you, this story was making no sense to I'll do a rundown of the chapters.**

**1. Piper and Leo are 17, about a year and a half before they graduate.**

**2. They are both 18. Takes place about a year after chapter one**

**3. Pretty soon after chapter three, graduation. There are flashbacks in this chapter too.**

**4. One long flashback chapter. Set a year before the first one.**

**5. Takes place a few months after chapter three. End of the summer. There are flashbacks in this chapter too.**

**6. Set not too long after graduation. But the flashback is set a few weeks before Piper and Leo break up.**

**7. Nathan POV flashback chapter. Set just after Piper and Leo break up. About 6 months before the first chapter. The flashbacks in this chapter are set a few hours before the stuff in normal text.**

**8. About 5 or 6 months since chapter 6. Leo is studying medicine in Chicago. Flashbacks in here too.**

**I hope it makes better sense to you now guys.**


	9. Where Do We Go From Here Now

**AN: Here's part nine. As I said in the last chapter, it's just one big flashback. It's only a short chapter, but I love it as a standalone. This might explain something you guys have been wondering about. Set around six months or so after the party in chapter 4. Ok, here it is! This is set around the same time as chapter 7 is FYI.

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Piper was crying now. Tears streaming down her face at high speeds. And it was his fault. He should've just kept his mouth shut. But he couldn't just sit back and pretend he didn't see a problem. He noticed it all. The sneaking around, the keeping secrets, the drinking, the partying. It just wasn't like her.

"Fuck _off_ Leo!" She screamed, wiping at her face furiously. Those words hurt him to the core, but he stood strong, keeping the eye contact.

"Piper, just talk to me!" He pleaded with her, desperate.

"There's nothing to talk about!" Her voiced was cracked and choked. It killed him to hear her like that, but this needed to be said.

"There's a problem here! That's something to talk about!" She turned away from him. "Piper!" She spun around fast when he shouted.

"Leave it alone Leo!" He reached out and grabbed her heard by the shoulders.

"No!" She screamed and immediately, dropped to her knees, holding onto his legs. Leo lowered himself down to her level; brushing her long brown hair away from her tear stained face and wiped her cheeks. His touch was gentle and her breathing slowed down.

"When Piper?" His voice was calmer than it had been before. "Was it when I think it was?" She shook her head violently. Not speaking. "When Piper?" He asked again, and she looked down and floor. "Piper…" Leo tried again.

She looked up at his face. Seeing the raw emotion that was there. He had lost so much in the past six months. He should just give up. But he was still fighting. Still fighting for her. She owed him an explanation. After everything she had put him through. At least she could give him that.

"Not the party…" he voice was raspy and thick from the tears but she kept on, "I guess that's when it_ started_ but it wasn't then." She shook her head and looked back at Leo, who was watching her intently. "It was after that."

"When?"

"At another party. I was _drunk_ Leo. I don't know why I got drunk. I just did. And he just _there_. I didn't mean for this to happen." More tears fell and Leo, even above his heartache at what she was telling him, reached out and held her.

"I felt so bad the next day. I left without waking him. Went to see you. Do you remember that day?" Leo nodded, how could he forget. She acted like he didn't want him near her. "I meant for it to stop there. I did. But the parties just kept coming. I couldn't stop Leo."

"Piper…" But she stopped him.

"No, let me finish." He nodded again, waiting for her to continue. "Dan, he… he introduced to things I never wanted to introduced to. Every time I left him. I swore to myself it would be the last time. But it wasn't. I love you so much Leo. I didn't mean to hurt you."

Leo was crying now. He had never cried in front of her before. And it hurt her more than anything ever had.

"Nathan, Rick and Jamie?" Leo asked hesitantly. He already knew the answer. Piper nodded.

"They were always there." Piper told him, "Doing the same things."

Leo nodded.

"Where do we go from here now?" Leo asked her. Piper looked at him with tear filled eyes. He didn't deserve her. He didn't need her. He could be with any girl he wanted to. He could do so much better than her.

"I think we need to end this…" The words she though she would never say. Leo's tears swelled in his eyes again. Heart shattering. He looked at her desperately, willing her to say something different.

"Leo…" He just kissed her forehead and walked out. Too much pain to comprehend running through him.

Piper heard the door close and collapsed to floor. Crying her heart out.

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**AN: I know it wasn't my best but that's really hard scene to write, and I'm in a state of severe depression over Leo. I watched the episode just before I wrote this. I spent two hours crying and haven't been able to write anything of this story since. But yeah, I finally wrote this. I'm still pretty ahead of myself, by around 7/8 chapters,which is good. I hope to write the next one soon**


	10. Can't Block You Out

**AN: Chapter 10. This is set at the same time as chapter 8 was? You understand all the time jumps. Sorry, if you don't but it really is the best way to get it all in. For me it is anyway. Ok, this chapter is again short but 11 is going to be longer I hope to make up for it. This is just another short filler on feelings. I love writing them.**

**Disclaimer: None of the characters belong to me. None of lyrics that appear here too do either. They belong to t.A.T.u, Blink 182 and Anna Nalick.

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**

Piper sat the end of her bed, watching with sad eyes as Prue played with Jake at the other end. She hadn't seen her in a month, the last time she was at Jake's first birthday. _Jake birthday. Oh god._ Piper caught herself just before the tear collected under her eyelashes and looked back over at her sister and her son.

"He's so big!" Prue cooed, making baby noise at Jake, who was laughing adorably back at her.

"Yeah." Piper nodded and touched his chubby little hand lovingly. Staring down at the bed.

"You miss Leo?" Prue asked, wary of her words. She knew the whole story with him. She had seen Piper cry over it all. Well, she didn't know about the latest incident with him…

Piper nodded silently, as memories of that night came back to her. She closed her eyes to try and shut the memories out, but they just exploded behind her eyelids even more violently.

_**.xXx. I keep closing my eyes **_

_**but I can't block you out .xXx.**_

The note was in the top drawer of her desk; underneath countless textbooks and stationary, but it was still there. Sometimes when she looked in the direction, she could feel it burning her. Piper knew that she just throw it away, bury it away in her memory and move on. But somehow she couldn't. It was Leo.

_You need to move on with life. If your still stuck on me, you'll never be happy. I want you to be happy. I never wanted anything else. So forget about me._

How could she move on and be happy without him. They were talking about the love of her life, even though she only was 18, she knew love. Leo was love. He always had been, even back when they were just "friends".

Looking out of her window, from her bed. Everything was dark outside, except for the harsh, orange street lamps. She rolled over onto her side, trying to get to sleep. Knowing that it wouldn't be possible.

Leo.

_**.xXx. I cannot sleep, **_

_**I cannot dream tonight. **_

_**I need somebody .xXx.**_

Every now and then, Piper would sit and stare at the phone for a while. Fighting in her head whether she call Dan or not. Just to tell him about Jake. But in the end she never did. It was pointless. He wouldn't care. He'd just pass the "blame" to her anyway. It would be better for Jake if Dan didn't know.

One time a few weeks from Jake's first birthday, Phoebe caught her staring; she always knew what was going on in Piper's head. They were so much closer then her and Prue were.

"If you want my advice…" Phoebe started and Piper looked away from the phone. She always wanted advice. "Don't call him. It'll save more heartache in the long run." And then she walked out again, leaving Piper on her own.

Piper watched the phone for a few more seconds before walking over to it and dialling another number instead. One that never let her down. Not once. One that would bring more heartache than she though possible.

_**.xXx. There's a light at the end of the tunnel, **_

_**you shout, **_

_**coz your just as far in **_

_**as you'll ever be out .xXx.

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**_

**AN: Yep, short and pretty crappy but the next one will be better. Fingers crossed, I'm going to go and write that now. **

**Ok, I have this idea in my head. I'm not sure this is going to be much longer than around 20 chapters. But I have ideas for a sequel. Would you like that? It's not certain that, that's what going to happen but if you like that idea, say so in a review.**


	11. Stars Of The Summer

**AN: Well I tried my hardest with this chapter. I hope you like it.**

The force of the memories as they came rushing back caught Leo off guard and overwhelmed him; making him light headed. Staring at the front door of her house, looking at his reflection in the glass.

His hair was ruffled and sticking out in different places, mostly due to the number of time he had run a shaking hand through it. Nervous habit. His eyes were red and bloodshot from the lack of sleep.

He hadn't slept a bit since that night in the alley, which was now two days ago. He couldn't. Every time he closed his eyes he was haunted by the vision of the woman in the alley. The feeling of her cold flesh pressing against his, her lips on his… It felt so wrong. Like he was betraying Piper, because he was.

And that was how he came to be where he was now. A plane flight later, stood in front of the door of her house, shaking violently, debating whether to knock or run as far away as he could.

**.xXx.**

_A twelve-year-old Piper screamed playfully as Leo jumped onto her from behind and she laughed loudly as they both fell to the ground with a soft thumping noise. He rolled off her and tried to catch his breath, while still laughing pretty hard._

"_You ok?" He asked, placing his hands behind his head staring up at the starry sky with his perfect green eyes. She nodded, breathing deeply in and out. _

"_The summer's almost over…" Piper said softly, quietly sad. Leo turned his head to face her. _

"_Yeah it is." He nodded. And for a while they just lay there in a comfortable silence._

"_So when we get to school, your not just going to ignore me?" Piper asked, her voice was quiet; she was scared of the way Leo would react. Leo looked back over at her, the moon created just enough light so he could see her eyes. They were moist. _

_He reached over and pulled her to him._

"_No." That was all he said. That was all he needed to say. And that night, Piper and Leo slept beneath the stars of the summer._

**.xXx.**

He dragged yet another hand through his already messy enough hair. He needed to get this over and done with before he chickened out. It was Piper. The Piper who had been his best friend since he was thirteen-years-old. The Piper who he had been through so much with. And he was scared her.

Well, not so much of her. But more the reaction he was going to get. The reaction he deserved.

He still couldn't believe what he had done. Left her a note. He knew that she deserved better than that, but he just couldn't wake her. For all the reasons her said, he just couldn't. And he regretted that now. Maybe if he hadn't done what he had done, he wouldn't be in this position right now.

But like he had thought to himself so many times before. You can't go back. You can't change the past.

**.xXx.**

_They had always been close, even when they just best friends. Before any thoughts of anything romantic ever came to their minds, they had always been unbelievably close. Closer than any two people had ever been almost._

_The phone in Leo's room rang, and he picked it up instantly. He knew who it was on the other before they even spoken._

_"Hey Piper!" But something was wrong; he could hear ragged breath and sniffing sounds, "Pipe, what's wrong?" He asked her, his voice filled with concern. There was no answer, "Piper!" He shouted then._

_"Yeah…" He voice was cracked and thick with tears._

_"What's wrong?" He heard some more sniffing and then she spoke, "Jeremy broke up with me." That was all she had to say. He was there._

_Walking into her bedroom he saw her sat on her window seat, staring out at the street beneath her. He walked over and placed a hand on her shoulder._

_"He's stupid Piper. Forget him. He didn't deserve you." She turned to face him, looking up with puffy tear stained eyes. "He didn't deserve you." Leo repeated as she fell into his chest._

_"What if it was me Leo? I did something wrong." As she spoke, more hot tears fell from beneath her eyelids, on Leo's shirt. He didn't care. All he cared about was her right now._

_Leo just shook his head, "You can't so anything wrong Piper. You're perfect."_

_That was when they were 13._

**.xXx.**

She was in her room with Jake; watching him sleep, when there was the tiniest knock on the door. She hardly heard it at all. But it was there. She was sure it was. Taking Jake out of his crib and into her arms. Watching his sniffle as she disturbed him.

"Sorry baby" She whispered to him and kissed the soft skin on his head.

Walking down the stairs Piper felt that odd feeling in her stomach again. The one where it felt like your whole insides had been tied up into knots and flipped upside down. The one where it felt like the butterflies had turned into break dancing elephants. The feeling she only ever had around one person in the whole world.

She shook it off, not bothering to think about it and carried on down the steps.

"Hold on!" She called to the person stood outside as she reached for the keys.

**.xXx.**

_She looked beautiful in that dress. More beautiful than Leo could ever have imagined anyone to look ever. She walked down the stairs to him, and Leo though he was going to drop dead right there, on the spot. Cause of death: heart attack._

_"Hi." She said, her cheeks flushing a deep shade of read and she looked at the floor. Leo let out a small laughed and using his index finger and thumb; he pulled her chin up to him._

_"You look beautiful." He whispered, pressing his lips against her cheek and smiling at her. "I have this…" He looked down at his hands. His turn to blush now. He had a corsage for her. She smiled at him again._

_"Thank you." She said and he placed it on her wrist._

_"You ready?" He asked and she nodded. Together, hand in hand, they walked out._

_-x-_

_He smiled down at her as he held her tight against him, swaying in time to the music. He squeezed her hand that lay on is chest. She smiled back up at him, right in the eyes and at that moment Leo couldn't hold back anymore._

_"Hey Piper…" He started and she looked up again._

_"Yeah."_

_"What am I to you?" He asked, not knowing where he had gotten the courage from._

_"You're my best friend Leo." She told him and his heart fell._

_"Not anything else?" He asked in a last attempt to try and make her see. She looked at him confused._

_"Leo-" But he silenced her by his lips on hers._

_That was the night they got together. When they were almost 15 years old._

**.xXx.**

"Leo…" His name came out her mouth in almost a gasp. He stared back at her. His eyes unfocused as he drank the sight of her in, "What are you…" She trailed off and they just stood there, staring at each other.

The awkward silence hung between them almost painfully, this broke his heart more. He had to do something.

"I needed to see you." His voice was strained, from the fatigue but he didn't care. "I needed to see you." He repeated it for her. To make her see.

"I can't do this right now." Was all she said and she went to shut the door. Leo trapped it with his foot.

"Piper, I need to talk to you" The tears threatened to come but he held them back. She shook her fiercely, her long chocolate hair whipping around.

"The letter Leo." Her voice was firm and Leo looked down at the ground. There was nothing he could do to make it better. He was the one who caused the pain. The letter.

"I know Piper. I need to talk to you about that…" Piper made another effort to close th door but Leo stayed strong, "Piper please…" And he looked right at her with those eyes of his.

That was her downfall. When the wall she had built around her came tumbling down. When he looked at her with those eyes. Just like so many years ago.

**.xXx.**

_It was the summer and the sun was high in the cloudless sky. Piper was ay on her front garden reading. That was what she always did. Her older sister Prue was off somewhere with her boyfriend, Phoebe was out on her bike somewhere and Piper read._

_All the other kids ignored her mostly, picked her because she didn't "fit in" like other kids did. She was different. She stare out at them playing with hose pipes and buckets of water across the road from her. Looking at the faces of the kids. She knew a lot of them from school. Shaking her head she looked back down at the pages._

_When she felt an intense gaze burning into her, she looked up to see some of the most beautiful eyes she had ever seen. She knew who this boy was._

_He smiled at her and she smiled back politely and began to read again._

_"You always read?" A voice came from next to her and she jumped slightly. It was him. Looking up at him, shielding her eyes from the sun she nodded._

_"Yeah I do." He nodded back and sat down next to her, offering his hand._

_"I'm Leo." He said and laughed a little._

_"Piper" She answered him._

_Where it all began._

**.xXx.**

"Piper, please. I need to talk to you. Please." Leo was near begging and she knew it. "Please." He tried again, his voice was soft and sad. And that broke her.

She nodded slightly and opened the door fully for him and waked into the front room. Leo smiled a little to himself and followed her.

This is was it, all over again.

* * *

**AN: I thought this chapter was cute. I actually liked writing this one. I hoped you enjoyed reading it guys. The next chapter is going to carry straight on from this chapter. Ok, Review please .!**


	12. The Hint Of These New Tears Are Sharp

**AN: This chapter isn't going to be too long. Actually pretty short. But I like it that way. I'm so in love with this story. More than I have been for any other story I've written. I hope you all like just as much.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the characters that appear in the Charmed TV Series. Nor do I own the lyrics I use in this chapter. The Sharp Hint Of New Tears by Dashboard Confessional.

* * *

**

She held Jake tighter to her as she sat down. Almost as a shield against what was going to happen next. He sat down at the chair opposite and looked at her intensely. That was the moment when Piper first got a proper look at him.

He looked awful. His hair was messed up and spiking in all different directions. His eyes were red and there were dramatic dark rings forming around them. His clothes were crumpled and creased; he was one big mess. And Piper felt almost responsible.

She shook her head and reminded herself. He gave her the letter. Not the other way around. It was his choice to do that.

"What do you want Leo?" It came more blunt than she wanted it to, and saw him almost flinch under her words. But she couldn't take them back now.

"You." That was all he said to answer her and Piper could feel tears sting her eyes as she tried to hold them back. Resistance was futile. They came anyway.

**.xXx.**

_**The hint of these new tears are sharp.  
I try to choke them back.  
But it's useless.  
I am useless against them.  
They are beating me with ease.**_

**.xXx.**

His heart broke for the twentieth time that day when he saw the streams running down her cheeks. It almost hurt too much to look at her, but he had to. He had to tell her this.

"Two nights ago…" He stopped for a second, searching how to word this, "I was hurting Piper…" Another pause and she looked at him, "I went to a bar."

He let the words sink in to her. Leo never went to bars. He swore he would never drink again after… well, just after. She closed her eyes for a second, bracing herself for what was coming next.

"I was drunk… There was a woman there…" And she felt herself freefall and she held Jake even tighter. Leo knew how much he had hurt her by those words. But he also knew that he had to tell her.

"Is that what you came here to tell me!" She was almost shouting now. Holding back because of Jake, sleeping in her arms.

"No, Piper…"

"You couldn't tell me this over the phone could you! You just had to be there to see the look on my face didn't you!" No more holding back now. The feeling were letting rip. Jake was crying., Leo felt like crying and Piper was way beyond tears by now.

"Piper that's not it!" He shouted back, his voice cracking under the strain and his throat stung. But she had to know.

"What the hell is it then!" She was so sexy when she was angry. He couldn't help thinking that, even though he knew he shouldn't. It was the way her deep brown eye would flash almost gold, the way her long chocolate hair would move it was the way her lips curled. It was all those things.

"It made me see!" Leo shouted again, louder and angrier than he intended it to be. "It made me see, I want you! No one else ever. Just you Piper." His voice softened as he continued and she nearly broke again.

But she stayed strong.

"Leo…"

"It's always been you Piper." At that moment Jake stopped crying completely and looked at Leo with wide blue eyes. Piper looked down at that baby and shook her head.

"I don't think I can Leo." That hurt.

"Piper, we can try though." He was desperate now. He would do anything to get her.

"No, we can't. We've tried too much. We're only 19…." He voiced broke totally at the end and Leo nodded and walked over to her.

"I'm not giving up Piper." He kissed her forehead and walked out of the house. And just as the door banged against the frame, Phoebe walked into the room to see Piper sobbing.

"I heard him. I thought you might need me…" And she walked over to her older sister, holding her as she cried.

* * *

**AN: That wasn't my best, and please don't hate me for not getting them together again just yet. It's not the end of the story. Don't worry. It's just, if I got them together now, there would be no story. Just trust me guys. Ok, please review! Oh and the next chapter is another flashback.**

**Really, guys.. please reveiw on this one, even if it's to say you don't like it & to gove me constructive critism.**


	13. Problem

**AN: This chapter is set the same night as chapter 9. You may want to go back and read that chapter first. It's not too long, but I didn't want to make it any longer.**

**Warning: Some drug use in this chapter. Not too graphic though.**

**Diclamier: I do not own any of the characters that appear in the charmed TV Series. I do not own the lyrics that appear. Sleeping With The Light On – Busted and Nothing Hurts Like Love – Daniel Bedingfield**

**.xXx.**

_**I feel her slipping through my fingers  
Now she's gone  
I'm sleeping with the light on  
And shocks went through my veins  
Now that she's gone  
I'm sleeping with the light on**_

**.xXx.**

Numb. As her stared out at the opposite wall in front of him. That was all he felt. Numbness running through his ice-cold bloodstream. She had gone and done what he had been denying for weeks maybe even months now. He lost count somewhere as the days and nights began to blur for their group. Blur into a whirlwind of drink, drugs and partying.

Leo never got sucked in, but he was forced to watch, helpless against it all. He had to watch from the sidelines as Dan wormed his way in and took them down from the inside. He had to watch as the foundations of the five's friendship came tumbling down around them.

Sometimes he though he had the worse end of the deal. Then he looked at Piper, Rick, Nathan or Jamie. He saw the emptiness that their eyes held. The pain etched into their faces. He saw the way they would put on a mask everyday, and he saw the way they all hated what they were becoming.

And it had all ended up at the moment that killed Leo forever.

"_I think we need to end this…"_

He'd never guess that she would be saying those words. They were just teenagers, true, but they were old enough to know that they were in love. And that was really all Leo needed.

So this is what happens when love just isn't enough. This is what happens when Dan comes to town. This right here, all the mess and destruction and broken hearts, is what fucking happens.

Knock on the door.

He kept silent and hoped the person would just go away. He didn't really want to see anyone as the tears fell fast and furious down his cheeks. Burning into his skin.

Another knock on the door. He buried his face in his pillow as he lay down, squeezing his eyes shut tight. Praying that whoever it was would just walk away.

"Leo?" His mom, he shook his head a little, keeping it in pillow. "Leo?" He heard again, but kept silent and held his breath.

_I'm not here. Just leave, leave, leave, leave. I'm not here._

He kept himself silent for a long time, and even before he realised it, sleep overtook him, while his eyes were still wet and the light in his room still shone brightly, he fell into an uneasy, nightmare riddled sleep.

**.xXx.**

Piper was still on the floor in a heap, the same way Leo had left her. He had never waked away from her before. Never. That's what hurt her the most. Even more than the break-up. He walked away from her while she was crying. And it hurt like hell.

"_I think we need to end this…"_

Had she really said that? Had those words really come from her mouth? Crying harder and harder until it hurt her chest and throat. When it got to that point, she cried even harder. The tears just kept coming, think and fast. Each one scorching itself into her broken soul.

Loud knock on the door.

She tried to keep the sobbing noises down, but she couldn't. Her body racked and the door pushed open. She could feel the cold atmosphere as soon as the person walked into the room. Ripping her apart even more.

"Piper." The voice grated on her and she forced herself to look up into the cold grey eyes that were boring holes into her skin. "You're crying." That was all he said. She felt no concern or warmth from him as he knelt down and took her face in his hands and kissed her. The kissed was hard and hurt her almost.

He pulled back and pressed a small white pill into her left hand. She looked at him with wide eyes.

"It's not the first time Piper." He wasn't lying. It wasn't the first time. All she could hear was Leo's voice echoing through her brain. Vibrating off the walls of her skull.

"_There's a problem here!"_

He was right there was. Leo was right… _Leo. _She looked down at her hand and swallowed. Dan nodded firmly.

"Good girl." He said and kissed her hard on the mouth again. And she just let him.

**.xXx.**

_**Nothing hurts like love,  
Nothing brings your heart so much pain,  
And you'll never learn till you get burned,  
Till you're burned by the flame**_

**.xXx.**

**AN: Well that was dark. I don't know where that came from, but hey I kinda liked it. Please review guys.**


	14. Not The Way They Were

**AN: This is yet another flashback, this one is set around 2 or so months after the last one. So Leo and Piper have broken up by now, she's with Dan…but she's not pregnant yet. Ok? Got it? Good.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters in the Charmed TV Series. Nor do I own the lyrics I use in this chapter. They are from an amazing song called 3AM by Busted, and I also use Breath by Anna Nalick.

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**

_**I'm calling you at 3am and I,  
I'm standing here right outside your door  
But I don't think that my heart can take much more  
I'm scared of cracking up again I just  
Want it to be like it was before  
And I don't think that my heart can take more**_

It was dark outside, the autumn air stinging Leo's bare arms as it whipped around, but he didn't care. He stared dead ahead as his walked forward, keeping the same steady pace the whole time. His feet almost had a mind of their own as they moved down the hauntingly familiar route.

And there he was. The place he hadn't been to in two months. 62 days. The place that it hurt too much to think about. He forced himself to raise his head and look at it. He forced himself to feel his heart shatter in his chest again. He forced himself to feel the pain he had been denying.

It had been two months since he had seen her properly. Sure, there were glimpses here and there in the hallway but nothing else. Nathan and Rick didn't talk to any of them anymore and Jamie was forced to move away shortly after things went bad.

5 friendships. Torn apart at the seams. They would never heal and Leo knew it. He wouldn't. Not if he didn't have her.

**.xXx.**

"_You okay Leo?" Her voice was soft, and she raised her hand to graze his shoulder. He wanted to flinch and turn away from her touch, but knew that would hurt her too much. So instead he closed his eyes and he just let himself feel her hand on his shoulder._

_He tuned to look at her, and almost immediately wished he hadn't. Her perfect brown eyes were flashing gold with deep running concern and she was biting her bottom lip. _

"_Leo, I know it's bad right now. But things are gunna be okay." She made total eye contact as she spoke and he nodded. "I know things are never gunna be the same, but it'll be okay. Eventually."_

_His mother who he had loved and looked up to all his life was gone. Just like that. No warning, no chance to say goodbye. Twisted metal and broken glass. Just like that and she was gone forever. _

_He could remember the police telling him and his dad. They were sat in the front room. Leo kept his eyes fixed on the opposite wall as they told them. The wall was red; it was his mom's favourite colour. She had painted that wall. _

_She wasn't ever going to paint another wall again. She wasn't ever gunna laugh again, or cry or walk. She wasn't ever going to nag him about his room again, or tell him how much she loved him. She wasn't going to even breath again. _

_He saw the police get up and he saw his dad let them out. And then he saw his dad fall to his knees and curse at sky. He saw all this but none of registered in his mind. That's when he stood up and walked steadily out of the house. Not one tear falling._

_Not until he'd seen the look on concern on Piper's face._

"_Yeah, I'll be okay. If I've got you." He said and buried his head in her shoulder._

"_You have." She whispered into his hair. "You always will."_

**.xXx.**

Piper heard the faint sound of tapping on the front door. She had fallen asleep on the couch that night. She rubbed her eyes and padded to the front door, trying to wake anyone else that was asleep and looked through the peephole.

_Oh._

_My._

_God._

Her breath began to get shallower and shallower, her heart beat soaring. She was terrified. But she knew she had to open the door for him. If she didn't she'd be plagued with the "what ifs" and she already had enough of those as it was.

"Leo…" She trailed off as he stared at her with wide eyes.

"I need you Piper. I need things to go back to the way they were." She wanted to just agree and throw herself into his arms. She wanted to just tell him yes and bury her face into his t-shirt again. But a nagging feeling at the back of her mind held her back.

"I can't Leo." She heard his heart break; it matched the sound of hers.

"Why the hell not Piper?" He was angry now, she could tell but she wouldn't give in.

"Well, take a look Leo! Things aren't the way they were! They can't ever be again! Nathan's gone off the deep end, Rick's no better and Jamie's gone. Leo!" She was screaming at him now.

Leo shook his head.

"I want us to be together Piper. I need us to be together, because I can't take much more of this. Everyday. Not having you, it's killing me slowly from the inside out. I need you."

_In and out Leo. In. And. Out._

She looked at him for a while and watched as he tried to control his rapid intakes of cold air. And shook her head, staring at her bare feet.

"I can't."

And they don't know how long they stood there, coming to terms with the stone hard facts of their lives.

_**'Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable  
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table  
No one can find the rewind button

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**_

**AN: I know that wasn't so good, but I just wanted to get this chapter down. Please reveiw, because thats the only way I know if you like this story and if I should keep on posting it. Becuase I've finished writing it, but if no ones reading it... or liking it then should I carry on posting. And if you dont like it then; tell me why. I can re-write parts to improve. Constructive critism is always good.**


	15. Far Apart

**AN: Chapter 15. I've really tried with chapter. I hope you guys like it. Oh, and its set right after part 12, a few days or so.**

**Also, thank you to everyone who reviewed with encouragement. You guys rule. Without you, I would've stopped posting. But you convinced me to do other whys. Thank you thank you thank you.

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**

"You just let him go." Paige's voice broke Piper out of her haze, and she nodded slowly. "Why!"

Piper breathed slowly, focusing on the sound of air rushing in and out of her lungs, _keeping her alive_. That, and Jake was pretty much the only things that were right now. After Leo showed up again, she hadn't really left her room, let alone the house. She just sighed and turned her head to look at Paige.

"Because… I'm so sick of fighting," She breathed in deep again, composing herself, "Ever since we were together, it just seems like one long fight. I'm tired of it." She bowed her head and stared at her bedroom floor, her long brown hair falling around her head.

"Piper…" Paige placed her hand on her best friends back and rubbed softly as she saw a single tear splash onto the carpet beneath her feet, "I get it." Piper shook her head.

"But that's the thing…" She told her softly, her voice barely making a sound, "I don't."

Forcing her head upwards she took one look at Paige and fell forward onto her, her head falling in Paige's lap and cried. She cried for Leo's heartbreak, she cried for Nathan and Rick and Jamie, she cried for little Jake never getting to know his father and then she cried for herself.

"It's okay… shhhh… it's all gunna be okay, Piper." Paige comforted her, stroking her best friends hair as she sobbed uncontrollably.

**.xXx.**

_Leo picked up the phone next to him and punched in a number, almost unconsciously._

"_Hello?" He heard her voice and it was as if all the bad feeing were drained from his body as he lay on his back, staring at the white ceiling above him._

"_Hey you." He answered her and he could almost feel the smile on her face at his words.  
_

"_I didn't see you today…" She said trailing off at the end, waiting for him to pick it up._

"_I wasn't in." He told her, but knowing she knew that._

"_You okay?" She asked, her voice full on genuine concern for him. He nodded to himself. That was his Piper. His Piper._

"_Yeah just a bad cold." He said and reached for the glass of water on his bedside table._

"_Good." She sighed and laughed a little. He was okay. She sat back down onto her bed and rested her back against her headboard. Closing her eyes as he spoke to her._

"_Did I miss anything today?" He asked, not really caring about school, just wanting to stay on the phone to her, to keep hearing her voice._

"_Well…" Piper laughed and they talked on the phone for long time that night. Not about anything in particular, just about little things that popped into their heads._

_Two teenagers in love. _

**.xXx.**

Leo stood a couple steps away from the canvas, as he stared at the picture he had just painted. Not quite knowing what he had drawn at first, he waited until his eyes came back into focus and he cleared himself of all the emotions running loose around his head.

And he focused on the canvas.

It was her.

In all her tauntingly beautiful glory. Her gorgeous brown eyes playing with my heart as stared harder at the painting. I'd drawn her, without even realising it. How is that possible?

"That's beautiful Leo." Came a voice from behind him, a voice that brought back too much pain. A voice he hadn't heard in years… He spun around at an almost break neck speed to face the voice.

"Nathan."

He looked different from the last time he had seen him. His eyes weren't burned with blood red around the edges, he wasn't deathly pale, and he wasn't as thin. He looked healthy. His eyes were back to the light blue that had been so long ago, his cheeks were flushed with pink and he had a good weight.

He was the old Nathan.

"Hey." Leo said, setting down his brush and staring and him. Nathan laughed slightly.

"I heard you were back in town, thought I'd come to see you. It's been a while…" Nathan scratched the back of his neck nervously. Leo nodded slowly, still not quite recovered from the shock.

"Yeah, it has." Leo answered eventually, breaking the wall of unbreakable silence separating the old friends, keeping them apart. Nathan looked at Leo and took a few steps forward, and they hugged.

"Yeah, it's been a while." Leo breathed as they released each other and all of the painful memories rushed back into their system.

**.xXx.**

_"Nath! Nath!" Leo shouted as he gripped his friend by the shoulders, shaking him, "Nathan!" _

_But it was no use, Nathan just stared off blankly into space and laughed, Leo looked at his pupils and they were only about as small pinpricks._

_**Oh God**._

"_Nathan! Answer me goddammit!" Leo screamed and let go of his shoulders, causing Nathan to end up in a heap on the floor, still laughing hysterically. _

_This wasn't the first time Leo had found him like this, far from it. But this time was getting to Leo, he had never been this bad. **It was getting worse.** So there they stayed for a while, a long while at that, just that way. Nathan laughing on the floor, Leo stood over him, calling his name every now and then. _

_And then laughing stopped and silence hung there._

"_Leo?" Nathan's voice was quiet and cracked, breaking up as he spoke just the one word._

"_Yeah, I'm here Nath." Leo told his friend and knelt down on the ground next to him, lifting his head so he could get a good look at him. _

"_Leo?" Nathn repeated. And Leo let go of his head._

"_What?" He asked. And Nathan just stared at the hard ground beneath him._

"_I don't wanna be like this." And he broke down, right there, on the cold damp street, Nathan broke down. And all Leo could do was hold his friend as cried. Helpless to do anything._

_And that's what hurt the most._

**.xXx.**

"I missed you, you know." Nathan told Leo as they sat down with their coffees. Leo just nodded. This still didn't seem real to him. "I'm clean." Leo smiled then and his friend smiled back.

"How long?" He asked, taking a sip of the hot liquid.

"About a year and half now, since around the time Jake was born…." Leo hardened at the mention of Jake.

"You know about him?" Leo asked, a diamond hard edge appearing in his voice, one he couldn't even try to hide.

"Yeah, everyone does. He's a cute kid." Nathan told him, staring at his hands, unable to look Leo in face. Knowing what he would see there.

"You been to see him?" Leo asked another question and Nathan squirmed in the seat.

"No." He said quietly and though a bit before adding something to that, "I couldn't. I wanted to. But I was trying to stay clean… to many memories you know…." He trailed off and took a big gulp of his coffee.

Leo nodded. He understood. It was odd that he did, but he did. And there was that silence again. A silence that almost hurt.

"How's Rick?" Leo asked, flinching inside as he remembered the last time he and Rick and spoken.

"_No, Leo, it's not. And you know it too. Piper doesn't love you anymore!"_

"Clean too." Nathan told him, smiling again. Leo was proud of them, he really was. They'd sorted themselves out. "He's training to be in the army." And Leo nodded again.

"That's awesome." And Nathan nodded. "You heard anything from…" He couldn't bring himself to say the name, even after all this time. He still couldn't say his name.

"No, not since Piper ended it with him." Leo nodded again and stared at the clock on the wall. Listening to the second hand as it made it's way around the face.

Funny how time went so slowly when you watched it, when you were aware of it. But so quickly when you weren't. It had been almost 7 years since he had met Piper. But it seemed like yesterday.

"You spoken to Piper?" Leo asked Nathan and Nathan shook his head.

"It took me to long to get up the courage to come see you. Rick's still working on his…." Leo nodded again and remembered something else.

"How's Jamie?"

"I don't know Leo. She stopped talking to even Rick after about month of her moving to Canada. I don't know."

Five former best friends.

How did they get so far apart?

* * *

**AN: I was going to make this longer by adding in another flashback but I thought that this was a good place to end it. I sort of liked this chapter. It's not really a big one as plot development goes but I liked it anyway. And Nathan's back. I had too! Oh, and Paige is in it D. Heh.. I love Paige. **

**And Leo drawing, was just a thing I wanted to add. My friend is an awesome artist and sometimes she'd just draw things without knowing it. Just going where it took her. So yeah…**

**Please review.**


	16. When Infinate Ends

**AN: So this is chapter 16. Another flashback, short chapter. Set after chapter 9, but before chapter 14. So her and Leo have broken up by now, she's not pregnant yet.**

**Warning: References to drugs in this chapter. Nothing extremely graphic though.

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**

Flashing lights.

Pounding bass line.

Sweaty teenage bodies cramped into a small space.

Just another party.

Just another night.

It was always the same. Always the _freaking_ same. Every single night, that's just the way it was now. I far, sorrowful cry from her innocence. And she cared, more than she let people know. More than anyone could know. Everybody thought she liked her new life, even she didn't. Everybody except one person.

_Leo Wyatt._

He saw through the act she put on everyday. He saw right though it all. Just like he had seen through the glasses, braces and bad clothes. The way he'd seen her when she was invisible to everyone else. He was the only one who ever could.

And his words haunted her.

_There's a problem here! _

_There's a problem here! _

_There's a problem here! _

_There's a problem here!_

They echoed in her mind, almost painfully rattling around. She couldn't forget. So she drank to help her forget. She partied to help her forget. She spent more time with Dan to forget. And when that didn't work she just doubled her effort.

It wasn't working and she knew it. But maybe if she tried long enough, she'd be numb enough to forget.

"Hey baby" She felt Dan's hands grip her from behind and began to kiss her neck. Leo used to do this to her.

But with Dan she felt no love, or warmth. All she felt was iron grips, almost painful. She felt raw sex and she felt cold hard kisses. She hated it. But she didn't ever say no.

If she said she'd be alone. She'd have nobody. And that scared her. She knew that she didn't feel anything real for Dan. He was just another body to keep her from being really and truly alone. If she was with him, she wasn't alone.

But she _was_.

She had just lost the one person who had always been there for her. She had just lost the best thing in her life. She had given up on him. It was all her fault. And she knew it. If she couldn't have Leo then maybe this… this _thing _she had with Dan was the next best thing.

"Hey." She answered him, trying to move away from him, but he tightened his grip even further and continued with the hard aggressive kisses.

She didn't even try to fight them.

"You get anything tonight?" He asked and she knew what he meant. She shook her head. He raised his left eyebrow at her and spun her around. "Really?" He questioned again.

"No, not tonight." She said and his grip tightened again till it almost hurt. And not in a good way. He grabbed her hand and shoved it hard into his back pocket, so she felt a plastic bag. Her eyes grew wide as she pulled it out and she saw white powder.

"Go on." He said and pushed her into the nearest wall.

"Dan…" she started but that was when she saw his pupils. They were dilated and unfocused. There was no point talking to him when he was like this. They was no point talking to him anytime. His breathing quickened and she could smell the alcohol strong on his breath.

She closed her eyes and nodded, he pulled them into the bathroom around the corner and his hands roamed her body, they were hard against her skin. She closed her eyes like she did every time. Not because of pleasure like he thought, but because she was trying to block him out.

**.xXx.**

Leo had a picture of them on his bedside table. It had been months already and he still hadn't been able to take it down. It would say something about their relationship, something he wasn't ready for. It would say something about the finality of it. And he couldn't do that yet.

So he stared at it. They were so perfect in the picture. Smiling, close to each other, untouchable, _infinite_.

He had tried to speak to her but every time he did she just walked away. And that hurt. _A lot_. Almost more than the actual break up did. And he had no friends anymore. _No one_ to fall back onto.

Rick. Nathan. They were both going down the same route as Piper was.

Jamie. Gone. She was just as bad, but around two weeks ago, her mom decided to move them away. Smart woman.

Sure he had friends. But no one he could talk to. That hurt.

Every night he had the same dream. It wasn't going away.

**.xXx.**

_He and Piper, having a picnic in the park. Laughing and joking, having fun. The sun was always bright and the sky was always perfect shade of blue. And then the light would grow unbearably harsh._

_Piper would shield her eyes and look up at sun, and he would look at her. The sun carried on getting bright and bright, giving Leo a real view of her. She was thin and unnaturally pale. She got thinner and thinner, paler and paler. He eyes would grow redder and redder. He lips would go grey, followed by her eyes and skin. Her hair wasn't shining. It was dull._

_And then she would speak, "Leo…" just his name, and it always came out raspy, like she was dehydrated, "Help me…"_

_And then everything would plunge to black. He could here laughing. It was Dan's laughter. Then he would hear Rick's voice._

_**Piper doesn't love you anymore! **_

**.xXx.**

And would wake up in a cold sweat.

Nothing was the same any more.

He needed her.

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**AN: I know, I'm depressing and repetitive. But I promise this story's going to get better. Reviews please.**


	17. Falling Into Memories

**AN: Just a short, sort of fluffy chapter. The stuff in normal text takes place just after chapter 15. I think this story needs some fluff right about now. So here it is. It's kind of depressing fluff actually, but I can't seem to right anything else right now. Hmmmmmmm…**

**I know a lot of you want them to be friends at least, or get back together. Just trust me ok. I won't do you guys wrong. I promise.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the characters of the Charmed TV Series. Nor, do I own the lyrics I use in this chapter. One Year Six Months by Yellowcard. It's an amazing song.

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Leo watched her from a distance. She was smiling and laughing and acting like any other 18 year old out that day. But she wasn't. Behind the mask she was putting on, she was breaking apart inside. And no one could see it but him.

He longed to walk up to, take her into his arms and tell her things were going to be ok, just like he had done so many times before. But he couldn't now. They'd grown to far apart; they were separated by too much.

They hadn't always been like this.

.xXx.

**_I'm falling into memories of you and things we used to do  
Follow me there  
A beautiful somewhere  
A place that I can share with you_**

**_I can tell that you don't know me anymore  
It's easy to forget, sometimes we just forget  
And being on this road is anything but sure  
Maybe we'll forget, I hope we don't forget_**

.xXx.

_He heard the knock almost before it happen, well, not so much heard it as sensed it. He could always sense when she was near. Their souls had become so far embedded in each other's. So when he opened the door to see her stood there he wasn't surprised._

_Until he looked at her properly._

_He hair was a mess; mascara running down her cheeks and her eyes were stained in blood red. She was crying. And that hurt. Before he even opened his mouth to ask her what happened, she fell into him and continued to cry. So he just wrapped his arms around her and pulled her inside the house._

_Out of the rain._

_She fell to her knees and continued to cry, he followed her to the floor and brushed the hair from her face._

_"Piper honey…" He started but the sobbing just grew louder. He gripped her chin between his thumb and index finger of his right hand. With his left he wiped the tears away._

_"What's wrong?" He asked and she fell into his chest again._

_How many times had they been like this over the years that they'd known each other?_

_Too many._

_Too many times she had cried into him. She had been through too much and Leo wanted to take away all her pain and put it on himself. He just wanted her to be happy. It's what she deserved._

_"Dad…" She choked out in between painful sobs and Leo helped her to her feet. "He…" Her knees grew weak then. And Leo, reading her as always like a book, caught her in and picked her up._

_Had she lost even more weight?_

_He carried her up the 22 steps to his room and laid her down on his bed._

_"What about him?" Leo asked, grabbing tissues from on top of his wardrobe and handed them to her._

_"He just…" She paused to control her breathing again and wipe her face clear. "He just walked out!" And the tears came again hard and fast._

_Leo lay down next to her and put his arm over her waist, pulling her closer into his chest._

_"Why?" Leo asked and she knew if she didn't want to tell him she didn't have to. He wouldn't push her. But she wanted to tell him. She wanted to get this feeling out of her._

_"I came home… and there was… there was shouting. And… it loud and angry. Prue and Phoebe… they were upstairs… in Phoebe's room…" She started crying harder again. And Leo waited until she calmed down a little to carry on. "They'd been shouting for a while… we heard a slamming door… Mom was crying on the couch."_

_Leo nodded and spoke, "He was just angry, he'll come back Piper." He stroked her hair and rubbed small circles onto her stomach with his other hand. She nodded and turned over. Breathing in his distinct scent._

_"I love you." She said, he voice thick with sleep and he breathing was slowing down._

_"I love you too." He answered and watched her as she slept._

.xXx.

That was so long ago. That was when they knew each other. Something he wasn't sure they did any more. But he wouldn't give up. Not until he had her in his arms again, shielded from the pain of the outside world.

Not until she said she loved him again.

But until then, all he had was memories. Memories of a lifetime ago. But they were enough to carry him though.

He caught one last look of her before turning around and walking. And that time, he could've sworn she saw him. And he could've sworn that she smiled and him. And it was a genuine smile.

Maybe it was wishful thinking.

But he sure hoped not.

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**AN: Reveiws please guys.**

**OVER 100 REVEIWS. YOU GUYS ARE AWESOME. I LOVE YOU ALL INFINATLY.**


	18. Leap Of Faith

**AN: I know this story is getting really depressing but I'm going to bring this stuff into the realm of "not-so-freaking-depressing-all-the-time" soon. I swear, I'm going to try to, just for you guys, my readers who I love and adore forever. Ok dudes, this is set after the normal text in the last part.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the characters of the Charmed TV Series. I don't own the lyrics I use in this chapter. One More Sad Song by The All American Rejects.**

**This has strong resemblances to chapter 11. But it is different. Especially at the end of it.

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He had to go back soon. He had to go back to Chicago, and leave her. He had to go back for school and train to be a doctor. His mom always wanted him to be a doctor. He had to it for her.

He had to go back soon. And he didn't want to tell her. He didn't want to be near her, to hurt too much for him to do that. But she deserved to know he was leaving, even if she didn't care, she deserved to know. She deserved more than a note left on her pillow this time.

So he was outside her door, again. Trying to work up the courage to knock, again. Trying his hardest not to give in and run, again.

_Leo, she needs to know. She needs that last chance to say yes. Hell, you need to know where you stand now. Your leaving in two days. She needs to know._

He felt like he was on the edge of a cliff, not knowing weather to stay on the solid ground and run or to take the leap of faith. To jump right out into the void, knowing you might not live through it.

Leo stared at the door.

**.xXx.**

_Piper clutched her books closer to her as she walked down the street, keeping her eyes glued to the ground. Avoiding eye contact with people as walked down the street, trying to make herself invisible. And to most people she was. Turning the corner to walk down he street she sighed._

_Nearly there now. Back to the safe four walls of her room. No one could see her there, and that was the way she liked it._

"_Hey Piper!" She heard a voice from across the street yell. She gasped as she realised who it was. No, not him. She kept her eyes on the ground and quickened her pace slightly. "Hey! Piper!" _

_He was crossing the road now. She didn't have an escape, but she tried anyway speeding up into almost a power walk._

"_Piper." He was jogging up beside her now, and he put a hand on her shoulder, stopping her. Oh God._

"_Leo, hi I didn't hear you…" She lied, pushing her glasses up her nose from where they'd slipped. _

"_I figured." He raised an eyebrow and motioned to her books, "Want to get those?" He asked and she shook her head._

"_No, it's fine." She told him and started to walk again._

"_Why are you in such a hurry?" He asked, falling in to match her pace, step for step. Why won't he just **go** already? Take a **hint!** _

"_I'm not." She lied and he stopped her again, by stepping in front of her._

"_Yes you are." He insisted and took her books from her, and for once she didn't protest. "How come your acting like this now? You we're awesome all summer…"_

_**He knows why!** _

"_Why Pipe?" He asked again she shook her head._

"_Because! I'm a** loser** Leo! Why would **you** want to be seen with **me**! It'll just damage your image. So I'm giving you the easy way out." She snatched her books back and almost ran, but he was faster._

"_Piper!" He yelled as he caught up to her outside he front door._

"_What!" She was almost angry now, as she spun to face him. _

_He smiled goofily at her and pulled her into a hug, she dropped her books to the floor; but she didn't protest._

"_Let me in Piper. I'm not like the other kids." He told her as he let her go, she smiled back at him._

"_Ok."_

**.xXx.**

That was the first time she had ever truly let him in. The first time she didn't shy away when other kids where there. The first time she wasn't scared to admit that she was his friend.

And it was one of the best moments of his life.

If he walked away now, which he knew that he could do if he wanted to, he'd never see her again probably. He'd just walk right out of her life. But he if he knocked, took the leap of faith it could two ways.

She could slam the door in his face, and he could then walk away. Out of her life forever.

Or she could let him again. And it could be another best moment of his life.

Leo took the leap of faith.

And he knocked on the door.

**.xXx.**

_Leo tugged on Piper wrist, but she resisted his efforts. She wasn't going to move. He let go and pouted at her._

"_Please Piper." He said in a baby voice she just shook her head._

"_I don't want to Leo." She told him and he stepped towards her. _

_Things had gotten better on them being friends front. She let him talk to her in school, and he always walked her home and carried her books. But she still wouldn't talk to his friends, the same fear of rejection all over again._

"_But Piper, there's nothing to be afraid of!" He patted her shoulder and cocked his head sideways. She just looked back at him, giving him a look, which clearly said, "You **know** what there is to be afraid of Leo. You **know**."_

"_Leo…" She whined at him and pushed his hand off._

"_Piper, come on. They'll love you." She laughed a little bitterly at that. "They will what's not to love?" _

_He softly gripped her wrist again and tugged, this time she moved a step forward._

"_I don't know Leo…" He silenced her when he placed a finger over her lips. _

"_Please." He was being genuine. It would mean so much to him if she would just meet his friends. He wanted her to. If only she'd just let her guard down to other people. If she just let it down she'd see that not everyone wants to hurt her. "Please."_

_She looked at him for moment and they both silent. "Ok." She nodded and his smile grew wider._

"_Awesome!" And he pulled her down the hall._

**.xXx.**

She knew it was him before she even opened the door. She knew it was, and she felt dizzy from the emotions flooding her. Not knowing whether open it or pretend she wasn't in.

But she decided that the latter was pointless. He knew she was here. He could sense her. Just like she could sense him.

She could stay inside, stay in the confines of the house, or she could open the door. Open her door and let him in again.

She didn't need much time to think about it. Her heart told her to open it, her head told her not to. Her soul told her to follow her heart.

Piper opened the door and let Leo in.

**.xXx.**

"_Leo!" She yelled when she saw him down the hallway. _

"_Piper!" He yelled back, ignoring the odd looks from people all down the hall. They did this every day, they were known for it. She ran down the hall to meet him and threw herself into his arms. _

_He picked her up and swung her around and she laughed. He loved her laugh. Behind them they heard clapping._

"_Hey Rick." Leo said, putting her down. Rick just laughed and shook his head slightly._

"_When you guys gunna hook up already?" He asked, and laughed more when he saw the deep red spread across both of their cheeks. _

"_We don't like each other that way…" Piper said stubbornly. Again, this was something they went through every day with their closest friends._

"_Whatever." Rick said airily and threw his arm around Jamie who was walking up to them. _

_Leo just looked at Piper. He wasn't interested in her that way. They'd been best friends for two years now. Since they were 12. They were just friends. That was all._

_The bell rang down the hall and Piper sighed. _

"_Next lesson…" Leo just nodded and watched her as she walked down the hall. _

**.xXx.**

The look at her face as the door swung open made Leo's heart melt, and with it any thoughts of leaving. Her smile again, just like the one he thought he saw the other day. A genuine smile.

"Hey." She said and broke him out of his spell. All he could do was look at her, dumbstruck. He'd just fallen in love all over again. And it didn't hurt, for once it felt good.

For so long love was something Leo had run away and hid from. He'd gone to Chicago to try and escape it and it still hadn't worked. For so long love for Leo and Piper had been something they'd tried to ignore. They'd tried to deny. They'd almost forgotten what it was to love and not be scared.

Forgotten what it was like to just be happy and content with love. They'd forgotten. But now they'd just got reminded.

And he couldn't hold back any more.

With that first brush of lips the fire was re-ignited. Her arm snaked around his neck and his around her back, holding her close. It had been far too long. They pulled away to smiling eyes.

"I love you." They spoke in unison.

**.xXx.**

He hadn't told her. He couldn't. The way she kissed him was enough to make him forget. It was enough to make him want to stay in San Francisco forever. It made him want to forget being a doctor and he want to stay here. With Piper and Jake.

She clung onto him and cried for a while, and for once they weren't tears of sorrow or pain. The tears that were skipped down her cheeks were of happiness and relied. God that felt good.

"I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you." She kept on repeating into his shirt. He loved hearing it, once wasn't enough? He kissed the top of head and told her loved her more.

He told her how he's always loved her. He told her about how he felt the first time she let him in. The first time she mat his friends, the first time he knew that he was in deep trouble, he'd fallen in love with his best friend.

He told her everything he'd always wanted to tell her, about how much he missed her and about how good it felt not to be so far apart.

Most of all though he just told her how much he loved her. How much he was always going to love her.

But no matter how much he spoke, he still didn't tell her one thing. One very important thing. He still didn't tell her that he was going back to Chicago in two days.

**.xXx.**

_**One boy, one girl, two hearts, their world**_

**.xXx.

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**AN: Review and I'll post the next chapter quicker. Get that guys, more reviews quicker update. .**

**Is anyone else in love with the character of Coop? Yeah, I thought so.**


	19. Heart Beating Faster

**AN: This chapter wasn't really too hard to write, it sort of just spilled out. I re-wrote it a few times, but nothing drastic changed. The length of this one is like, awesome too. I'm so proud of myself. D. I hope you guys like it. Chapter 19:**

**Ok and jut for clarification, that I was asked for, The last chapter was present day, as is this one. The italics are flashbacks.

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Piper stared in her bedroom mirror and glanced over her appearance for the twentieth time that night.

"What about the blue top?" She asked Paige as she spun around and walked back to her bed, which had clothes strewn all over it.

"You look fine Piper." Paige assured her and jiggled Jake on her hip.

"But I want to look…" She stared, pushing long strands of hair back out of her eyes as she bent down. "I don't know…" Paige nodded.

"You want to look, gorgeous, sexy, so that he can't take his eyes off you?" She laughed and Piper laughed too, but nodded.

"Yeah, like that." Paige set Jake down in his crib and sat on the bed next to Piper.

"It's Leo Piper. He'll think of you like that any day…" She paused and brushed a hand across her best friends cheek, "He loves you sweety."

Piper nodded and smiled. Paige was right. Leo loved her, no matter how much she had hurt him he still loved her. Even when they weren't together, he was always there for her. In ways no one else ever was. He had helped so much with Jake.

He was always her saviour.

She had let him in.

One last look in the mirror and she smiled back at herself. _I'm ready. _She grabbed her purse and kissed Jake on the top of his head.

"Be good baby. Bye Paige!" And she out of her bedroom door, in time to hear the shaky knock on her front door.

Leo.

**.xXx.**

He was more nervous than he could remember being as he wiped his clammy palms on his jeans. _Keep cool Leo, it's Piper. You know the girl you've known since you were twelve._

_Breath in and out. Calm down._

He smiled to himself as memories of their first official date ran though his mind. He was almost as nervous as he was now. Almost, not quite. He really had nothing to be nervous of. Not then, nothing could've touched him then. The girl he has loved for two years loved him back.

Nothing bests that feeling.

Nothing beat the feeling of when the girl you love smiles at you, and in that smile you can see everything she feels in that one smile. Nothing in the world could ever feel better than kissing the girl you love and holding her close to you, nothing is better than to feel infinite.

**.xXx.**

_Her mom opened the door to Leo and stood smiling at him._

"_She's upstairs getting ready still," She laughed at Leo's nervous expression, "You'll be fine Leo." She patted his shoulder and led him into the front room. He had been here so many times before but today everything felt oddly new and unfamiliar._

"_Hey Leo!" Phoebe was sat on the coach, flicking aimlessly through channels. "Piper threw me out… she gets real pissy when she's stressed out." She laughed as Leo gulped hard, "She's just really excited."_

_Yeah he was too. His stomach felt like the butterflies had been kicked out by the break dancing elephants that had since moved in. He sat down next to Phoebe, who instantly threw her arm around his shoulders._

"_You know you lucky. We don't have to give you the boyfriend quiz. Seeing as we've known you for so long." She whispered in his ear. "With Jeremy we were here for an hour." Leo suppressed his jaw clenching at the mention if Jeremy._

"_Yeah…" He answered her vaguely, his eyes fixed on the stair, wanting to see her come down. _

"_Leo, breath." Phoebe told him after a while and he let a out a breath he didn't even know he had been holding. She laughed. "I'll go get her…" And he watched as Phoebe ran up the stairs._

_He wiped his hands on his jeans. And looked at the clock, watched as the red second hand made it's away around the minute, the tick-tocking noise sounding loudly in his head._

"_Ahem…" He heard Prue clear her throat from the doorway. Leo's eyes widened as he turned his head to look, "Here she is." _

_Piper looked perfect. She'd changed her normal jeans for a dark denim skirt and she was wearing a red spaghetti strap top, black heels on her feet._

"_Wow." He let out without knowing and he grinned as he saw her blush a deep red that matched her top._

**.xXx.**

Leo stared Piper in the eyes as he sat across the table from her, she was so perfect. There were no other words for the way she look right then except perfection.

"You look… just…wow." He breathed out as he reached for a breadstick, and laughed as she blushed. He loved to make her do that.

"Thanks." She was scared and he could tell by her voice. It was quiet and submissive; she looked down at the table as she spoke. He wanted to take all her fears and throw then out the window. But he couldn't.

He still hadn't told her.

"Look at me." He said and she slowly pulled her head up to look at him. _Leo, breath. Breath in, breath out. In and out._

"I have something to tell you." He reached for her hands and she let him. He brushed his thumb across her fingers and closed his eyes at the electricity he instantly felt at the touch. "I don't think you're gunna like it…" He trailed off as her eyes grew wide and almost sad.

"What is it?" She asked him and he felt his heart drop into his stomach. Lower and lower.

"I have to go back…" He told her, not able to look her in the eye. He didn't want to see the hurt he caused there. He didn't want to watch as her gorgeous chestnut eyes flashed grey and went dull. He didn't want to see that happen because of him. "I have to go back to Chicago."

That's when he looked up. And just when he had thought his heart couldn't fall anymore, it hit the floor.

"Ok." Her voice think with tears she reached for a napkin to wipe at her eyes, where hot tears were forming.

"You want to go?" He asked, squeezing her right hand slightly. She nodded. "Ok then." They stood up and he laced their fingers together. "Let's go Pipe."

**.xXx.**

"_Come on." His breath tickled her ear and she giggled a little. He loved that noise, "Come **on** Piper." He pulled her arm and she shook her head._

"_I would rather stay here." She whispered back against his lips and he smiled, kissing her lightly before turning around. _

"_But we have to go…" He pouted and pulled on her arm. She kissed his bottom lip and pulled him back to her, pushing him against the tree. His eyes widened._

_He loved the way she acted with him. The way she was so passionate yet loving. The way that there was something behind her kisses, they weren't empty. He loved her, and he knew it._

"_Piper…" He fake whined and she laughed again, sending shivers down his spine. Her face edge closer to his, slowly. She knew what she was doing. And just as he closed his eyes, she moved her face away again. He smiled at her, almost frustrated. She smiled back._

_His stomach jolted as he felt her cool breath on his neck. **Oh God.** He kissed her, pulling her further into him. When they pulled apart they smiled at each other, both their eyes dancing._

"_I love you." He told her._

"_I love you too." She said back._

_One more kiss and this time when he pulled her to walk with him, she didn't argue._

**.xXx.**

The drive back to her house was deathly silent, neither Piper nor Leo daring to make a move. Neither daring to smash the ice barrier. When she wasn't watching he stole glances at her. She was staring blankly at the windscreen, no emotion showing in her face.

Piper sat motionlessly watched as the rain ran down the windows, concentrating fully on that. She had to, if she didn't she was afraid she'd break down, and she didn't want to do that. She had cried too much. And she didn't think she could handle any more.

That was when he spoke.

"You ok?" His concern was burning into her skin, scorching her as she carried on staring ahead of her. She lied to him, and nodded.

But she saw straight through he lie and shook his head. "No your not." He spoke bluntly, and she just carried on staring, "Piper talk to me…." He desperation cracking through his calm ripped her from her stoic state.

And a tear fell.

"I don't want to…" Her voice trailed, scared that the tears would show. The lights ahead of them turned red and Leo braked softly, the car gently trailing into a halt.

"Please." The tone was commanding, and almost made her jump as she felt her resolve shattering and replaced with anger.

"Talk about what Leo? The way you're _leaving me again_! The way you _used me again_!" That hurt and he physically flinched, but she kept on going, "You held me and told me that you _loved_ me. Last night. And now you're telling me your _leaving_ me! What _is_ that Leo! I'm so _sick_ of you leaving me! What? You miss out on the look on my face last time! You wanted to see how much you _hurt_ me this time! Is _that_ it Leo!" The tears creating a salty screen over her cheeks as she shouted.

Leo's hands gripped the wheel tighter, knuckled turning white. Her words cut through like a razor on skin. He wanted to kiss her, he wanted to take all the pain away, but he couldn't. Yet again. He couldn't stop her from hurting. Yet again he failed her.

The car drew up outside the manor and he looked at her as he turned the engine off.

"Let me walk you in." It came out as a soft question, almost begging for her permission. She was emotionally exhausted and sick of resisting everything all the time. She nodded and he smiled.

It was a sad smile.

She opened her door and stepped out. Leo looked at her once more, sending her one more smile before opening his door and stepping out.

**.xXx.**

_Piper sat on the floor of her bathroom at 2AM; her knees drew up to her chest and she biting her already too short nails. A million incoherent thoughts whizzing around her head, making it hurt even more as she stared at the white stick on the other said of the room._

_She wasn't ready for this, she didn't want this. She was all alone in this and it hurt. She made pushed away the only person who had never let her down. And even as she was doing it he struggled to stay by her._

_But everybody has his or her limit. And she had pushed him right past his. _

_Now she had hit hers. With the four words that were burning into her mind. Each of the words were no longer than five letters, but with every one she fell a little further._

_Blue line means baby. _

_And that's when she looked up at the clock again, the second hand resounding inside her head. _

_Time up._

_-x-_

_She held the phone in her shaky hands, the tears lashing down her face, staining her cheeks as she dialled the first number she thought of. Even if she knew she shouldn't, she had to. _

_Ring. Ring. Ring._

_Her heart beating faster and faster, hurting her chest as it did. _

"_Hello?"_

**.xXx.**

She had her back to him as it happened, and she hated herself for that. If she would've been facing him maybe she could've told him, shouted at him to stop.

Save him.

But she didn't and she heard the horn and the screech of brakes before anything else. She spun around at almost lightning speed, just in time to see.

-x-

He felt the pain in his head first; it felt like it was caving in on him. Then came the chest and the arms and the legs. The pain was the most intense thing he had ever felt in his life.

Well almost.

He felt himself being thrown backwards and land on the bonnet of the car and roll onto the hard ground beneath him. And just before the darkness closed in on him.

He heard her scream.

_Piper.

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**AN: Don't hate me. Please. Review and I'll put up the next part quicker. See that:**

**Reviews equals Laura happy equals Laura updates quicker.**

**Thanks guys.**

**And cookies for anybody who caught the Taking Back Sunday lyric I used very coyly in this chapter.**

**And again, for the record. Coop is awesome. Like, really. Worship him bitches. Of course when I say "bitches" I mean that in the best way. Coz you guys are just so frickin awesome. In the awesomest way.**

**Chyeah, I LOVE YOU. I'd love you even more if you review though. Believe it.**


	20. Flatline

**AN: Well, well, well. The last chapter of "Just Breath" I really loved writing this fiction so much. Possibly even more than I did with Black Orbs. Which I didn't think was going to be possible. But it was. I don't know what it was about this one, it was just so easy to write.**

**I really could've gone either way with this ending. I wrote about three different versions in all, this was the winner. But yeah… I was going to end differently in the original. **

**Wow, 14 reviews. I love you guys. Really, wow.**

**Ok, Chapter 20:

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_"Hello. What is your emergency?"_

**.xXx.**

And that was when Piper felt her world implode. The second she felt the foundations of her life crumble and that was when she died on the inside. Nothing hurt as much as that moment did. She couldn't breath for the pain, it was drowning her. And she didn't want to be saved.

At some point her knees had given up the fight and she was on the pure white floor beneath her. She was vaguely aware of arms around her waist, pulling her up again, but she couldn't stand. She wanted to be on the floor. She felt safer down there.

The noise was still there in her mind. The noise, the moment, the everything that sent her into this state. And she couldn't shake it. She closed her eyes and scream, trying to block it out. But it wouldn't go. It's all that was there in her hazy unfocused mind.

The noise of the flat line.

**.xXx.**

_He was deathly white, almost so he faded into the sheets of the hospital bed. The walls to, and the harsh light that covered the room. Everything around him was white. Except for the smears of crimson, covering him in different directions._

_She was scared of the colour white. _

_The tubes the he was nestled in scared her even more, so did the machine that would beep and make other noise that she didn't know what they meant. But what scared her the most was the fact that it was Leo lying there._

_Her Leo._

_"Leo…" She said to, taking cold of his hand, squeezing it a little. "The doctors said you could hear me if I talked…" Another stray tear betrayed her eyes and she wiped it away hastily. She would be strong for him._

_Piper looked down at her best friend in the whole world and stood still and silent for a long while. Almost scared if she spoke that she'd miss something._

_"I love you Leo." And she swore she felt him squeeze her back, "I love you so much Leo." She repeated and there was another squeeze. So gentle it was hardly there. But it was._

_"Leo?"_

_And that's when it came._

_The sound of death._

**.xXx.**

"Piper honey…come on Piper…talk to me…" Phoebe held her pulled her up as she was trying to bring her back the edge of a breakdown. "Piper, the doctors are trying to save him, stay strong honey…"

But Piper didn't care what her sister was telling her. She just screamed louder, she screamed to block out the pain. And soon she realised the pain was the reason she was screaming.

"Piper…" Phoebe tried again, but Piper pulled away, falling on to the floor again, curling up, and sobbing on the floor. No one could reach her down there.

Phoebe stared intensely through the glass door and watched the various medical staff rush around Leo, shocking him, staring at the machine, looking for any change in the monotones tone.

"Clear!" One last attempt, she could see it in the doctor's eyes. That look of giving up, the shining tears and the shaking head. They could all hear Piper from inside. It just made this hurt more.

And that's when she saw what she was looking for.

**.xXx.**

_He gripped tight onto her hand, as the rain came down around them both, missing in the earthy smell. He stared straight ahead, biting hard into his bottom lip and he was shaking. But no tears fell._

"_Leo?" She spoke but he made no indication that he heard her. So she tugged on his arm a little, "Leo?"_

_He just carried on staring straight ahead, at the sky. His eyes had lost the shine they always had. The perfect green had dulled over into almost grey, matching the sky today. _

"_You want to be alone?" She asked, him trying again, not really expecting an answer. But this time he turned his head, the emotionless expression on his face made her shiver as he slowly shook his head._

"_No." It was a whisper but she heard him and she nodded, "I need you here." _

"_You always got me Leo." She told him as she noticed his gaze moving downwards, to rest on the gravestone at his feet. "Always."_

_"You've got me too Piper." And the thunder clapped above them and the heavens opened further, the rain falling harder as Leo fall to the ground._

**.xXx.**

"Piper…" Phoebe's voice had an edge of happiness to it this time. _How can she be so happy? _Piper looked up at her sister, the sobs still violently racking her whole body.

"What?" She choked out, still staying on the floor and still crying. She couldn't seem to stop the tears.

"Piper look…" Phoebe pointed at the glass door and Piper shook her head.

"I've seen him Phoebe. I don't need to again." Wiping at her cheeks forcefully, brushing back her hair.

"No…_look_!" Phoebe took a step over to where Piper was on the floor and pulled her up, "Listen…"

Piper refused to believe her ears. She had seen it. She's seen the machine go dead, she's seen her best friend and love of her life die. Just like that, she'd seen it all. It couldn't just happen like that. He died, that was it. He mind was just messing with her. Playing more cruel games.

"No. No. No. No. No." She started screaming again, this was all too much to take in. Piper pulled at her cloths and her hair, again falling to floor. Phoebe looked down at her big sister. She had been through too much for her age. This was just the thing to break her. But…

"Piper, the doctors… they brought him back…" Phoebe soothed her while she cried even harder. Not taking it all in, "He's alive…Leo's alive Piper."

**.xXx.**

_"Hello. What is your emergency?"_

**.xXx.

* * *

**

**AN: I wasn't too into this chapter but I think I had some good parts in there. Ok, here's the summary to the sequel. Yes there is a sequel. Love me?**

**_Working Title: Two Hearts, Their World (May change)_**

**_Rating: T_**

**_Summary: AU, No Magic. PL. The strength of their relationship is put to the test. All limits tried. You can only get pushed so far, before you start to think, What if we were never mean to be together in the first place? (Set seven years on from "Just Breath")_**

**And now, here's for the personal thank you's. **

**Charlie: Thank you. A fellow Coop fan. Hell yes.**

**Punk Rock Miko2: Thank you.**

**Nicole812us: Yes, he got hit by a car. Thank you.**

**PiperandLeoFan101: I bet you trust me even more now huh? I didn't let you down. Go me.**

**Fishgurlü: Thanks.**

**CraziChix: You really thought I could kill him? Well, in the original I was going to…**

**Babiexox: THANK YOU.**

**heather1021: That was a reaction I got a lot. Thanks.**

**Kcdancer: Yeah, I got a whole lot of that reaction too.**

**TVCrazed: THANKS.**

**-0-charmed-freak-0-: THANKS.**

**Alyssa Warren: I don't think the scooter would have the effect I was quite looking for somehow… Thanks.**

**-Leo-Piper-Forever-: I got that reaction a whole bunch. Thank you!**

**Little Miss Spell-of-the-Week: Thank you, I love the flashback too, they're a lot of fun to write. Another Coop fan; GO COOP. Thank you.**

**_To all my readers that have been here since the beginning, I love you all. And your support with story has kept it going. Thank you to infinity. I love you I love you I love you I love you._**


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